Member-only story
Your Expectations of Me Aren’t My Problem
Especially if you don’t make them clear to me ahead of judging me
“It’s just… You’re not living up to our expectations.”
It was obvious that giving me negative feedback was difficult for her. Even though it is hard to establish eye contact on a video call, she was clearly avoiding my gaze.
Even though I am used to getting feedback, it didn’t sit right with me this time. Her call came out of nowhere, her points were vague and unexpected, and her unease was contagious.
I asked her to elaborate. She said something about me not doing enough campaigns — which was true. But during every strategic meeting we’d had in the past year, we’d agreed that we needed to fix the issues on the website first and get clear marketing goals from the different business units second.
None of these conditions were met, so we never ran full-scale campaigns. I once took the liberty to come up with campaign ideas with a co-worker from the sales department, but I got reprimanded for wasting my time — because we were nowhere ready to run campaigns like these.
I didn’t want to defend myself. I have been taught that if someone gives you feedback, it is best to listen carefully and let it all sink in before you respond.
