Social Jogi
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Social Jogi

The Heat of the Moment

a poem about anger and aftermath

Woman holding her head with angry expression
Photo by David Garrison from Pexels

I’m in a vicious circle
of anger, regret, and debacle
The blood in my veins heats up
as if the temperature of a volcano — ready to erupt
They say it’s the heat of the moment
but really, it’s just the false reactions in my brain
along with the hollowness in my body
I’m holding my head in my hands
hoping it would help cool it down but it doesn’t

In fact, it rages it even more
The aggression in me grows
My heart beats faster in need of more and more oxygen
as my brain gets ready to take off
I lose control of my body
My mouth saying things I never thought it would
My hands destroying anything they grab hold of
I lose the sense of myself
my doing, my being
Is it the beginning of the end?
Or the end of my beginning?

I hear screams and shouts
from all mouths, including mine
I question myself,
“Will we ever again be fine?”
Until finally I’m brought back to the now dark reality
With consequences for my actions
With regret for my words
I feel the nerves in my brain
screeching, crying out of pain
It’s the aftermath of the volcanic eruption
The lava oozing out — spreading fire everywhere
but I’m the one who’s burning
I’m the fire, I’m the ice
I’m swimming in the pride and prejudice

But as I start to recollect the past
I realize it’s too late, the results are going to last
Before I know, I’m drowning in a sea of regret
not knowing how to swim
“It’s going to be alright,” I say
“It’s not going to last long anyway”
But what if it does?
There is no one I could trust

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Riddhi Mistry

Riddhi Mistry

Student. Reader. Scribbling my thoughts all over the internet. She/her.