The Power of the Present Moment: Alive Here Now
Ne Plus Ultra
Receptivity to stories that agree with realities driven by concrete evidence and facts have come in an inconsistent arrangement of various fruits of truth.My truth.
But what is my truth?
A question I have been pondering as of late.
A question deserving the respect and attention necessary for growth.
A question very important as one pans back and tracks the years which articulate my ideals and beliefs.
My truth, my authentic truth, contains the stories of my life. The stories which I tell myself. The stories I’ve experienced and have now intertwined with those I do not know to be exact and true.
A fear which has manifested itself over the years. An evolutionary fear, displaying varying aspects towards relentless traits of personal degradation and loss of self-respect.
In other ways, a loss of identity and self-worth.
But I am no victim here. I will not allow myself to play the victim in this scenario. Not now! Not in the current moments of my life. These words are not a ploy for sympathy from my inner, or outside world. With this breath and the ones to follow, I do so with an attitude of “Fuck it!”
At this moment, I find the courage to be harmonious with Truth. Relentless in my vulnerability. Courageous, while ushering in the illuminating convictions of the man I am today. Responsible for the accountability necessary for change.
Hello, my name is Brandün,
I am a reoccurring liar. One who is recovering from a constant state of truth remission. An addict of falsehoods. A weaver of spells dripping in half-truths and well-crafted manipulation. Guilty on all accounts of the grandest injustice one could fathom.
Not only am I willing to admit to being
powerless to the drunken plight of consistent truth — but I too must also admit to being a victim of a sobering actuality.
Not only to others have I lied, but my talents of theatrics eventually manifested with dedicated practice and ease. So much so, that I could even convince myself of the stories I spoke to the masses.
What an art form of grand showmanship I cultivated throughout the years. A talent I look back on as misplaced and disrespected.
Just to think,
I could have cultivated my forked tongue of unmatched lies into a lucrative career performing inside the playhouse and stages of your local Superior Court. I could have been the leading role as a Lawyer in the countless comedies and dramas unfolding every day right before a jury of our communities’ civil servants.
What could have been?
Nevertheless, I am.
I am remorseful of this truth. A truth I now speak with absolute humility. As much as I never wanted to fall off the respected wagon of integrity and honor, I would do so as a liar.
It is in this moment of introspective self-awareness and honesty, that I can see this character trait for the flaw that it truly is.
One which requires massive action.
It too is one in need of a healthy dose of compassion on my part. I remind myself that nothing was, nor could have changed, if not for first arriving at the starting gate of the present. Therefore, the grace I give myself begins the season of work I am to embark upon.
Where I can find the most encouragement in this venture of necessity, is in the tools I can channel throughout the process. A process of life’s journey towards completion. A journey that serves. A path In tune with the energy I generate, from the notion, that I am also serving something bigger than myself.
In finding alignment from within, I serve all. I serve the mystery. I serve the whole community. I serve myself. All because I am conscious of never having to feel alone on this walk.
I forget that the scariest of lies I have ever told myself is one involving being alone and abandoned. A lie of severe consequence. One which generates the unforgiving cycle of separation, thus, inevitably signaling the all too familiar pattern of introversion and reclusiveness.
Nope, not this time!
