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I’m An Underachiever, Damn It!

13 Legit Reasons For Underachieving — From An Out-Of-The-Closet Underachiever

The underlined word “achiever” sits over the two words “I’m” and “an”, creating a rebus.
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Reasons to Underachieve

  1. Underachievers have way more time to find themselves. We can do and learn virtually anything we want before deciding what to achieve. Whereas overachievers are already stuck in their achievements, too busy to discover anything new.
  2. Overachievers can be so full of themselves. It’s quite boring — always telling us how we can do something or what not to do. It’s like “shut up already” and go keep on achieving things. We know what we’re capable or not capable of doing, right? Kind of — I mean — I knew it the moment I read it in that self-help book — I may have forgotten — but no worries — I’ll just read it again. As I said, we have all the time in the world.
  3. Underachievers can screw up all of the time — anytime — and it’s fine. Nobody expects anything from us. On the other hand, overachievers have major expectations placed upon them from now until always. Failure for an overachiever is hardly an option. It would probably feel like crossing over to the dark — underachiever side — which for me, would be fine. All are welcome.
  4. For us underachievers, it’s always “time well spent” no matter what we do. On the other side, it’s only well spent if the result of their action can be measured in success.
  5. Overachievers are predisposed to early death. Okay, I made that one up but I like it. It's very persuasive.
  6. Seriously though, it’s probably true anyway. Overachievers are more likely to feel the pressure that’s been placed on them by themselves — although they probably have better medical insurance. Underachievers rarely get stressed— except when overachievers try to tell us about our underachieving — that — and when rent is due but other than that, never.
  7. Overachievers have a lot of assets, therefore, there’s a greater risk of being targeted for burglary or kidnapping — not for underachievers. I haven’t locked my piece-of-crap 2004 car doors since 2015. I mean who wants to live in fear?
  8. I love that saying, you know the one about “if you want to know God’s opinion about money just look at who he/she gives it to”. I think you could substitute “overachiever” for the word “money”. I don’t think it truly works but when it comes down to it, does it matter?
  9. Let’s be real. Unless it’s like a cure for a disease or something else result-oriented, it’s all about the process, not the achievement. We, underachievers, are processed-oriented individuals. We love the journey and because of this, we get a much better ride — a scenic ride if you will.
  10. Underachievers, therefore, are far better drivers. Case in point: Have you ever noticed how someone who has a Mercedes Benz drives?
  11. “Misguided souls and spirits? Not us. We know exactly who we are and who we are not — specifically — an overachiever. Underachievers tend to be more spiritual individuals. I have no evidence to back this statement but I have a hunch.
  12. Underachievers tend to put others first. This is a big part of the reason for us not overachieving. Overachievers, on the other hand, tend to put themselves first (they will admit to this) and are praised and rewarded for it. Where’s the justice?
  13. Overachievers are weighed down by all their accumulations from achievement. Underachievers' souls are as light as the air and can float away anywhere at a moment’s notice. Nobody may notice we’re gone but that’s okay.

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