May 7, 2022
THE MOM JOKES ARE HERE
Happy (Your) Momma’s Day, You Crusty, Old, Stank Ass…
Celebrating another round of Mother’s Day
It’s that time of year again. I almost missed it but there’s still time.
I’m writing this at 6:23 pm on Mother’s Day Eve.
Does it always come this early in May?
I think the powers in place strategically schedule Mother’s Day in a way for children to disappoint their moms.
Thanks to a Pandora popup ad, I‘ll have just enough time to write a few quickies and send out that e-card before it’s too late.
Your Momma Jokes, 2022
Your momma’s so round, she don’t fart, she fats cause she got no arse.
Your momma’s so ugly, between her and the seasick crocodile, I thought she was the crocodile.
Your momma’s so skinny, when she pole dances, each time she spins behind the pole she disappears.
Your momma’s so stupid, I asked her how she spells her name and she was like “h-e-r-n-a-m-e”.
Your momma’s so smart, naaahhh!!!
Your momma’s so fat, her anthem at the buffet is Shakira’s Try Everything.
Your momma’s breath smells so bad, the movie Don’t Breathe was based on her true story.
Your momma’s so stupid, I told her Halloween falls on a Friday the 13th (Halloween is always on the 31st) this year and she was like “Damn, that shit’s crazy. I wouldn’t want to be out trick or treating on that day!”
Thanks for letting me get these “Your Momma’s” off my chest. Speaking of, get your stank ass momma off my chest!
It’s now 6:47 pm and I’m out. Happy Mother’s Day.
S’more?
