Did I Hit the Reset Button too Late?
As I turn 45, I ponder over the ‘right’ time to start all over again in life…
It was only at the age of 38 that I felt a greater handle on my life, essentially on my thoughts and emotions. Perhaps, it was late, but the timing was right for me.
I was becoming ripe enough to be cooked, or savoured, however you describe it. Prior to that, I was living most of my life in ignorance, and blatantly at that. Then something came my way that cracked the shell open.
The lessons of separation and the consequent divorce made me turn a new leaf or hit the reset button in my life.
When I look back now, I realise how foolishly I lived.
But today when I’m foolish, it’s not of ignorance, but of curiosity and an eagerness to learn and know new ways of living and thinking…to be open with a positive mindset to life’s many possibilities.
When you know you know nothing, the resultant feeling of openness and wonder gives you a fresh perspective on life.
This approach to life comes only when you empty yourself from the inside out. This happened to me when I hit the reset button at 38. The richness of a spiritual life started entering me, one in which I was more receptive to new and unique life experiences.
I was walking into the unknown for the first time in my life. Of course I was scared, and sometimes overwhelmed… It was almost a back to school feeling, where you start from scratch learning alphabets of a new language!
Should I have taken this step earlier in my life…I wonder.
Perhaps not. Because, if it weren’t for heartbreak, I would not have learned how to travel through life more consciously. My experiences also brought to light friends and acquaintances I would have otherwise not known.
Also, the path is now pursued with more fervour — there is a thirst to search for real meaning and life purpose… To seek answers, not outside, but in the abyss of my mind.
Everything that dawned on me dawned at the perfect time…
At a time when teachings were not mere teachings but living experiences, that entered me more fully and wholeheartedly.
As many of us in this part of the world believe, perhaps, I had to work out my karmas, or pay off my karmic debts…all part of one’s spiritual development
Over the past few years, I have met some incredible people, and imbibed some transforming practices, like yoga and meditation, which may not have happened had I not been at the right and receptive age and stage of my life.
Moreover, these experiences and practices were cathartic… they brought to the surface all the previous emotional baggage I was carrying and made me work through them in a systematic way.
I soon realised that everything that happened to me happened for a reason.
I was growing as a person as a result of all my experiences — good or bad. This realisation helped me remove any resistance to the obstacles on the path… I took it all in my stride.
I felt my karmic load reducing. The reset button had finally come into play!
When on the spiritual path, you become more conscious in your living…
You realise there are many realms of the world that you haven’t even explored.
Earlier I believed I had to travel the world to discover new truths, but now I access new experiences every day from where I am.
The world is one; the only difference is how you look at it — with love or without love!
I have only touched the tip of the iceberg, making a gradual climb up after my downfall.
But I now feel more equipped with my practices and assured that my guru will show me the way, walking every step beside me. Of course, not to forget a loving family that always has my back!
Today I feel more empowered than ever before.
I don’t know what life has in store for me, but I’m sure I will able to take more conscious decisions and approach life with a greater sense of equanimity and balance.
Dear reader, take a moment to sit back and think, do you feel a vacuum in your life?
Do you feel like there is something more your heart and soul longs for?
This pandemic has given a lot of people time to reflect and make new choices. If you feel similarly, it’s time to hit the reset button… Like they say it’s never too late!
This is not a motivation speech; I’m just reiterating the fact that every failure has a silver lining. You just need to recognise it and act on it.
Every failure is a lesson to be learned — one that you will not learn in textbooks.
This pandemic has made a lot of people anxious.
They don’t know what to do, and a depression seems to be setting in. But it’s all about redirecting your energies, and looking at this time as an opportunity to hit the reset button on your life.
It can be a time when you reassess what works and what doesn’t, and how you could grow more as a human being.
Hitting the reset is not going to be easy as things will change.
You will lose some and then gain some — people, places, things! But it will only result in lesser detachment and greater involvement.
You will focus more on things that need to be done… On priorities that enhance your life, without serving some idea of what ‘should’ or ‘could’ be done’.
Ultimately, it will help you live in the now, and savour each more moment completely.
One of the positives of the pandemic is that we now value personal time more…
We value creation over consumption, small daily joys over big extravagant indulgences… We value the basics over the accessories.
On this 45th birthday of mine, I am aware of how much more responsible I have become after hitting the rest button in my life. This is also reflected in my daughter and the way she views life now.
I feel more empowered to leave behind a better world, filled with greater consciousness, for my daughter and all I encounter.
Blogging has made me reach out to many, and I will continue to share with you my experiences as well as gain new insights from you, dear readers.
To access my previous blogs, you can visit the archive section, and if you need any help hitting the reset button in your life, don’t hesitate to write me in the comment box below.
As I get ready to celebrate my birthday, albeit more consciously, I wish you a peaceful and safe summer…full of good health, abundance and peace!
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