Why I Blog on My Experiences
It’s been a year full of blogging, and I still feel I have more in me… So, I often wonder, what is it that made me start blogging, and what makes me continue…
Is it the nature of the subject, and the fact that single parenting is an ongoing journey? Or, is it simply an innate need to express myself, and stay connected with readers?
It’s probably a combination of many things — psychological, emotional and spiritual… I’ve listed some below… Once again in an attempt to articulate my experiences, and enhance my understanding of parenting and life…and, in the process, hopefully help you do the same as well.
Here are my top 15 reasons for blogging:
1. Sharing to connect: Many who observed the drastic changes in me after I became a single parent, saw some transformation, and suggested I share my experiences and coping tools. While the changes are ongoing — and still a lot to be desired — they felt I could perhaps help others by doing this. Blogging seemed like the best option to reach out to a wide audience, and connect with other single parents.
2. Getting over it: Getting over my ex-wife took time, and the process may still be on… The separation left me bitter at the start. It also left me lonely…with no one to talk too, about life, love, relationships, and parenting. Hence, I took to the pen to vent out my hurt and anger. My wounds may not be so deep still, and the loneliness has reduced considerably, but the writing continues to give my emotions a new perspective.
3. Writing as a calling: This was a calling I had to answer…one I felt I would not tire of soon, and could continue later on in life as well. Writing for me started off as a hobby, but is today a passion I devote adequate time to in the week. I now realize I was meant to start writing, and hopefully this endeavor will help me explore more options both as a career and in life… Perhaps, even delve deeper into subjects like spirituality.
4. Because, it’s exciting! The whole process of writing and publishing the blog is an exciting one for me. Not only am I smiling when I finish the last sentence, but I am also enthused every time a new blog goes live. I don’t worry much about the outcome — because it’s the process that is energising — but it is nice to see that the blogs are being appreciated, and to see the comments pour in.
5. Something bigger, perhaps? Blogging is a great way for the world to know me, and for me to know the world… My audience and I connect on common ground… The relationship between us feels like the start of a long and meaningful one. As I develop my voice further, I’m sure we will find other ways to interact, and know each better in the future…Perhaps, through offline programs,or a larger movement.
6. Creating awareness: Blogging on single parenting is a way of creating more awareness on the issue, and eventually making society more inclusive toward single parents, and also more sensitive toward their well-being. I hope my writing garners more empathy toward single parents, and they get the required support they need.
7. Healing myself: Expressing yourself is cathartic, and helps you heal… In the process, you heal the world as well. When you take time out to dwell on the deeper dimensions of life, everyone gets a little closer to understanding the truth, or, ‘their’ truth. Writing is a tool which I use to gain a better perspective to start living more consciously and responsibly.
8. Explaining emotions: During my separation, I went through various breaking points …some of them, not very pleasant. My behaviour took me, and the people around me, by surprise. Through writing, I found a way to express my turbulent feelings, and in a way, redeem myself. Blogging also helped me get rid of feelings of insecurity, and low self-esteem, that I was experiencing… It helped enhance my self-worth, and dissolve my sense of identity, taking me closer to my true self.
9. Making a point: Man always likes feeling superior…showcasing his intellectual prowess is one way of doing so. My writing may just be my egotistical self wanting to be heard and seen in the world… But when going through a low phase in life, it helps pick up the pieces, gain greater insight — based on your limited knowledge — and get my act together.
10. Experiencing midlife crisis: An aftermath of the separation, or simply a mid-life crisis, the strong urge to respond to a calling –‘before it’s too late’ — could have been one of the reasons for me taking to writing so passionately. My need to tap into my creative abilities before they dry up, constantly pushes me into writing more, and more often.
11. Using what I have: There comes a point in life, when you realize this is all you have — your past, your present, and your multiple life experiences… And, the only way to share your story is by writing. Because your experiences make the best stories. You don’t need to go anywhere to find more content, it lies right here, within you… The more closely we listen to life, and to that inner voice within us, the more actively we dip into a reservoir of ideas that connects with the world.
12. Gaining clarity: Initially, guilt led me to the path of self-improvement… During the process, I used various spiritual tools to help me attain some sense of self-realisation and awareness. It led to a gradual expansion of self…the need to be more than you are. Writing aids this process of expansion — it helps me translate my experiences into ideas, and my ideas into a clearer understanding of life.
13. Exploring dimensions: As you expand, you begin to go deeper into understanding yourself, and aspects of the journey called life. Writing helped me explore these unexplored dimensions… It also helped me overcome many fears and self-imposed limitations. This led to new doors of experience opening, all for a new life… The walls, that I had previously built for self-preservation, soon started to collapse.
14. Seeking the ‘truth’: Working on the self is an ongoing process, one that ultimately leads you to seek deeper questions, deeper truths… You also question your purpose in life, and how you can contribute to it more consciously. My writing has helped me drop my previous ideas of logic and reason, and surrender to an inner knowing… I now willingly surrender to the flow of life with gratitude, rather than trying to control it.
15. No reason, after all! There may actually be no real reason at all for the writing… Perhaps, this was just an exercise that needed to be done in the present moment…a call I had to answer. I have no clue what direction it will take in the future. But, when the words flow naturally, there is no reason to stop and comprehend, but to simply continue to go on…to go with the flow.
While, I have often felt confused about the reason for writing, the ‘what’ of my writing is always clear… Over time, through more introspection, the ‘why’ will become clear as well. But the more I write, the clearer my purpose gets, taking me a little closer to the bigger picture.
My quest for the truth, which has taken the form of writing, will continue in the coming year too… I’m grateful for all the support you gave me in 2018, and look forward to bringing you new and interesting ideas on single parenting in 2019. Here’s to a great year ahead for all of us!
In the meanwhile, do feel free to share your experiences on life and single parenting in the comments box below.
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