“Relationshopping” is Ruining Romance.
We’ve come to approach dating almost purely from the standpoint of scrolling through pictures on a screen and, based on a few images and a handful of sentences, deciding yes or not. If we decide “yes,” frequently we will then meet this person (though sometimes not until after weeks of anti-climactic texting) and within one date, decide whether or not to proceed. If the date wasn’t a fireworks display of lusty thrill and automatic attraction, we likely ax that person and move on with the assumption that, via dating apps, there are hundreds of other options at our fingertips (a false assumption, by the way).
This is “relationshopping.”
“Relationshopping” is ruining romance for several reasons.
It makes us think of people more like products and commodities rather than complex human beings.
When you choose people to meet based on images and a few sentences, over time, this can result in a de-personalization of people. It can result in regarding people as images and a checklist of supposed traits, versus a complex, multi-layered human being potentially worthy of getting to know over time.
Hence, things like ghosting then come far more easily to people (since they are not suddenly ditching and ignoring a “real person”…
