Fat where “F” Stands for Family
In Kazakhstan, we have a lot of old traditions that are still followed but would surprise many people. There are especially a lot of traditions regarding the weddings. It takes much longer than just one wedding day to follow all of them. I experienced that myself when my sister was about to get married.
I always had hard relationship with my sister, probably like any other siblings with age difference of more than 10 years. We often argued and did not talk to each other for days following the conflict. When she was getting married, I was just 10 years old. The traditions we had to keep, travelling two days by train to her groom’s home town and talking with people I did not like — all those things drove me crazy. My sister would always ask me to behave well and not to embarrass her. I hated that even more.
One of the days before her wedding, the groom’s side invited my family to a restaurant. That was the time for one of the most important rituals for the families of the wedding couple. It is called Kuyryk-bauyr asatu which directly translates to “liver and fat tasting”. This ritual is not common in a region I come from which made me quite hostile to it. The idea is that each person from both families, unfairly excluding the bride and groom, takes a piece of a cooked sheep liver and a piece of its fat from the back part of the animal. The liver and fat have to be served together forming some kind of a sandwich. Indeed, the size of the pieces sometimes can remind a real sandwich. Two pieces stick together due to the adhesive feature of the fat which symbolizes the families coming together and becoming one. It sounds quite disgusting and it has quite an unusual taste. However, this ritual is an essential activity before the wedding, so that the families in a way vow to unite.
As a normal 10-year-old, I was quite picky about food. No surprise that I tried all the ways to avoid following the tradition. I asked my sister not to participate in this ritual. And I was later told that it would be considered disrespectful. So I had to go through this together with my family. The ritual started with the older people eating first, and only then the turn went to the younger family members. After the adults ate the delicacy, each one of them would consume alcohol to cover the after taste.
As I observed everyone forget about their tasting experience after getting a shot of vodka, it was time for me to eat the liver and fat as well. My mind and my body were completely against the procedure. As I touched the liver-fat sandwich, the texture of the sticky fat on my fingers made me instantly want to throw it away. However, as everyone was looking and smiling at me, I closed my eyes and put the food in my mouth.
First, I tried to chew it but the gooey consistency of the fat did not allow my teeth to process it easily. My taste receptors urged me to spit it out but I still continued.
As I felt that I could not chew it any longer, I held my breath and swallowed the whole thing. I felt like this process lasted forever and that everyone was staring at me. However, now I realize that it was probably just couple seconds. The older people were chatting and celebrating while I was alone with my pain.
The same night I got into an argument with my sister. She was nervous about the wedding arrangements and I was upset about my tasting experience. During the argument I told her that she should have tried it to understand my devastation. I do not remember how the argument finished, but until all the wedding rituals were over we had more arguments.
10 years later, I still think that it was the worst thing I ever tried in my life. However, it is more of a funny story now that my sister and I remember and laugh about from time to time. Having moved to another country, I get to see my sister only once in two years. I miss her dearly and feel bad for all the arguments we had before. Sometimes I think I would even eat the same liver-fat sandwich again for her happiness.
Aila Baizhomartova is a fourth-year student in the American University in Bulgaria double majoring in Journalism and Mass Communication and Business Administration. She likes discussing the topics of culture and traditions by also sharing her heritage with others.
