Spanks McFanny Help Us All: A “Retelling” of the Bible — Exodus Chapter 6

Greetings and blessings, Spankolytes!

Fig. 1: Spanks McFanny, Who Succeeds at Failing. Image Courtesy of Me, Who Suceeds at Failing at Art.

In the previous chapter:

• Spanks McFanny convinced Pharaoh that he (Spanks McFanny) doesn’t exist.
• Pharaoh doubles down on enslaving and torturing Israelites, who resort to chasing unshaven men across Egypt.
• Spanks McFanny doesn’t really do much when Pharaoh and his minions engage in enslaving and torturing Israelites.

In other words, not much deviation from the source material.

We now join Jehovah distracting Dick-Lips with incest.

No. Really.

Reminder: I’m getting the bible verses from King James Bible Online. I only make two changes to the quoted verses:

• I replace “God” with “Spanks McFanny.”
• I replace “Jesus” and “Jesus Christ” with “The Taconator.”

Everything else is a direct bible quote, including the woman/snake hybrids.

Spanks McFanny help us all if I’m wrong.

1 Then the LORD said unto Moses, Now shalt thou see what I will do to Pharaoh: for with a strong hand shall he let them go, and with a strong hand shall he drive them out of his land.