My Wild Bipolar Ride
When the bright side of hypomania goes too far
Misdiagnosed
It wasn’t diagnosed until I was in my forties. Growing up, I thought my drastic mood swings were just me. There was deep depression me and center of attention me. Same me.
My initial correct diagnosis for Bipolar 2 was changed before we realized I was in fact dealing with the disorder. I went a long time without the right medication, and at one point, when I felt better, I stopped taking the meds I was on.
My divorce triggered dark depression and CPTSD — immediately followed by hypomania like I’d never experienced until then. I had something to prove, so that meant mega toy shopping sprees for my daughter, and getting the coolest, most overpriced tiny apartment I could find in New York. I immediately sold the business I loved, and decided to live off the money for a year and just “figure things out.”
I traveled alone and spent cash like I had an ATM in my backpack. Life felt like a party. I could only see blue skies and sunshine ahead, no matter who warned me to keep an eye out for storms. No one could tell me anything. I was positive that I had an exciting future. I wasn’t wrong.
Once I realized I had to start making money again, the opportunities I was sure would be there were…
