Preparing to Make my Exit
Writing my own eulogy.
Thinking about having an “Excellent Exit” of my life has spurred me on to fill out Do Not Resuscitate; Medical Advanced Directive; Mental Health Directive; and many more forms.
With this I started thinking about my eulogy. I wrote one for myself that expresses my desires about how I want to be remembered.
My eulogy
With Suzanne’s recent passing, she leaves a legacy that is specific to a large range of people. Suzanne wanted her children, Wendy and Jack, to be aware of others’ beliefs and respect different ways of thinking. She invited a Wiccan over for dinner, as well as a Fundamental Christian on different nights.
She was a foster parent with her husband and a Big Sister to a needy teenager. She included her son and daughter in the process of providing love to those who are dissimilar in numerous ways, yet are worthy of affection and dignity and share basic emotions and desires of the human race.
In her forties she was “adopted” by Charisse, a 30-year-old esthetician. She called Suzanne “Mom.” Charisse enhanced Suzanne’s life immensely. This experience encouraged Suzanne to take courses on Critical Race Theory and The 1619 Project to better learn about Charisse’s Black culture.
Suzanne became resilient, because of conditions that at first limited her. She stopped looking back at her childhood with fear and lack of understanding, and started looking within, which hinted at her future — she was already starting to pass on the baton. Her legacy was forming.
As if she were to climb Mt. Whitney, she faced the icy slope with a growth mindset. As one struggles from base camp to reach the summit, she used essential tools she had learned in therapy, much like the climber puts on her crampons securely.
Suzanne clung to the love of her supportive and determined husband, Cliff. Cliff taught Suzanne how to be self-accepting, willing to accept love, and how to thrive as an individual. This was a long project that Cliff reinforced with love and fervor.
Failure was Suzanne’s teacher. She passed on the lessons taught from the defeats in her life to her daughter and son. They learned to embrace failure as it showed them to have the courage to try a different method or task or thought process. Failure instructed Suzanne in lessons about self-defeating thoughts, self-destructive activities, and shame.
She felt as though she had a defect of some kind by growing up in a less-than-healthy family, but she became aware that that so-called “defect” led her to be more compassionate to other hurting souls.
Suzanne did fashion a life worth living through the foundation of love and understanding from her husband and children. Her friends accepted her open self and provided much kindness, empathy, and affection.
Suzanne is now there in the pristine quiet of nature’s majesty. She has reached the summit. As daylight turns to dusk, Suzanne has become one with the summit — a pinnacle of Suzanne’s end journey, which we celebrate today.
