Ask Olive

I’m Afraid, He’s Afraid

Advice for those who want it


Dear Olive,

I met a guy traveling and don’t know what to do.

I’ll give you the short version of my problem:

I met a guy while traveling in Europe. We ended up living and co-working together for four weeks and had the most incredible time together. We both knew our time was coming to an end, as I had plans to travel on and he had to move to San Francisco for work. We kept in touch every day and he invited me to visit him in San Francisco when he moved there. After two months apart, I flew over and spent almost four weeks living and traveling around the country with him. That time has now come to an end, as he needed to go back to San Francisco, and I had plans to go to Texas to see friends.

I’m crazy about this guy. I haven’t felt this way about anyone in a very long time, and I know he feels the same way. I’m British so I can’t stay in the States past a couple of weeks at a time. The problem we face now is that the time we are apart is too painful, and from his perspective, he doesn’t see a future for us, because I can’t be with him in San Francisco. We both want to see each other again. We both miss each other and he fears that the more we see each other the more attached we’re getting and the more painful it is when we’re apart…

I only had one solution: we carry on seeing each other when possible ( I said lets meet for New Year’s, in his home city of Toronto), or we stop altogether and forget each other. But that seems so crazy when we have such an amazing connection. He’s scared, and I’m scared, too, but I’m willing to just let it fall in place if it’s meant to be.

I’m a freelancer and can live and travel freely.

Any advice would be great.

Sincerely,

Help a Girl Out


Dear Help a Girl Out,
— Olive

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