I Hold the Key

… But Little Did I Know I Was Not Free

Freedom by juliankopald on Flickr

I felt I was free:

I could pick up the weirdest hobbies,
I could eat tamales or curries,
I could go to Iceland or the West Indies,
I could quit jobs, change colleagues,
I could choose partners for a moment or a few years,
I could decide if I want kids.

And yet:

Until I can dance under the rain in the town square,
Until I do not worry people could stare.
Until I can hop to the supermarket,
Until the dread of their judgement, I forget.
Until I can sing when they can hear,
Until it does not fill me with fear.
Until I can offer a smile for an answer,
Until I stop wondering if they think I could do better.

Until then, my freedom is minimal because until then, I keep it in a cage, social.