Getting Screwed Over Is Good for You
Cheaters may win, but bad asses win bigger.
Everyone has that one story about a time they got cheated out of something they earned. For example, a girl from Boston bumped me out of a prestigious MFA fellowship. She used her friend’s short story as her writing sample. A year later, that story won a major award.
What I mean is that the original author submitted the story, and it won the credit she deserved.
So the girl from Boston got busted.
Her name was Tabitha. None of us had ever met a real person with that name. Was she real? We all had our doubts. She arrived with such great expectations. Her first semester, all the faculty kissed her ass a little too hard. Even when she skipped class. One professor grew visibly despondent at her absence one day. He said something along the lines of “Things would be so much better if Tabitha were here.”
Sure, I was a nice potted plant. But I was also poisonous. By the way, have you ever drank absinthe at lunch time? I have.
Thanks, Tabitha.
The girl from Boston had money. She had fashion sense. Grace. And class. Rumor was that she’d turned down the Iowa Writers’ Workshop to attend our humble little creative writing program.
