Ciara releases new single entitled “Bad Sex and Nanobubbles”

SEATTLE — R&B signer Ciara unexpectedly released a new single today that is a depressing departure from her earlier music. The track, titled “Bad Sex and Nanobubbles,” tells the story of a newlywed who realizes she has committed herself to a man who is hopelessly bland.

A spokesman for the singer’s label would not say if the song is autobiographical and specifically about Ciara’s recent marriage to Seattle Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson. However, Ciara did confirm on Instagram that she recorded the track last night on her iPhone in the bathroom off the couple’s bedroom where “Russell had fallen asleep at 9:45 p.m. watching Law & Order.”

The song also has lyrics that seem at least tangentially targeted at the Seahawks QB, including:

“You said God wanted us to wait / I wish God wanted you to be great”

“You weren’t worth all the trouble / You’re more worthless than a nanobubble”

And then a closing line that doesn’t even attempt to rhyme and seems definitely directed at Wilson:

“How did I not see that you’re so lame? / And how did you not see Malcolm Butler in the Super Bowl?”

The track then ends seconds later when Wilson is heard saying from the bedroom: “Baby, what are you singing about? I’m trying to sleep.” Then Ciara says: “Ugh,” and the song is over.

Early reviews of the single have called it “not really a song” and “just a woman complaining about her boring husband into her phone while kind of tapping out a beat on the bathroom counter.” But the rapper Future retweeted the song and added: “This is amazing. A must listen.”