Study: America expected to increase swimming dominance as global sea levels rise

RIO DE JANEIRO — It’s a glass half-empty or half-full situation. With global sea levels continuing to rise, coastal cities and communities the world over are facing a water-logged future that would cause untold destruction. At the same time, according to a new study the United States would be in position to increase its status as a world power and win ever-more Olympic swimming golds.

A study published today by the Center for Oceanic Rise and Swimming found that the United States is uniquely positioned to increase its swimming medal haul in future Games.

“Even with Michael Phelps retiring, the United States has more than 12,000 miles of shoreline and more than 300 million people,” read the study. “Already a dominant power in swimming worldwide, the U.S. population will have to swim even more in the coming decades simply to survive as their coastal cities are consumed by water. It’s a recipe for destruction … of the competition in the Olympics.”

The U.S. government has done almost nothing to address climate change and rising sea levels, a fact many see as a calculated move to increase the country’s medals haul.

“The U.S. is the best at swimming, while they’re in the second-tier of snow sports,” said Harvard climatologist Dr. Godrey Pritchard. “So what do you do? You put energy and environmental policies in place that melt all the snow and increase the amount of warm, swimmable water. I think we’re already seeing the results on the medal stand and with all of the dead polar bears. Soon we’ll all be swimming to and from work, so swimming 50 meters in a race will be nothing.”

In light of the study’s findings, the USOC announced today it is moving forward on plans to build an open ocean training facility in Charlotte, North Carolina, scheduled to be open in 2030 or when Charlotte is a beach town, “whichever comes first.”