How to fall down.

Rejection is like falling down while running. It hurts. But you can get back up.

Jackie Colburn
Aug 23, 2017 · 4 min read

One of the biggest challenges I have had to navigate since I left my job is rejection. I’ve built spreadsheets with targets and tracking. I keep track of the people I’m meeting and the work I’m doing. The data is objective and it says I’m doing fine.

I started trail running about the same time I started my business. I’ve also been tracking my miles and logging my progress. Objectively, the data there is good too. I’m on plan. I’m going further and getting faster as the weeks go on.

Data is one thing. Feelings are another. It’s hard to deal with the sting of rejection and with the pain of falling down on rocks and dirt despite what the data says about progress.

When I worked for other people I could handle being told no. It was the company they were rejecting, not me. Being rejected as an agent of another organization was something I got good at. Being rejected as a solo entrepreneur is new.

Trail running this year, I have found myself falling down. Running is something that’s been a regular part of my fitness endeavors the past 3 years but running on trails is new.

Both rejection and falling hurt.

The thing is, I’ve discovered that there are some lessons to be learned from falling down that can be applied to the art of dealing with rejection.


Falling

The last time I fell down, I was eight miles into a long run. I was running on the dirt path next to a paved path around Lake Harriet. I tripped on a rock and felt the fall coming. I stuck my hand out but the rest of the fall was a roll that resulted in dirty limbs but no other injury. I fell in front of a bunch of people who were relaxing on the beach. Nobody said anything. I jumped up and kept running, stunned and feeling as if I should just keep going. A minute later, I realized I was having a hard time breathing and sat down on the side of the lake. I let it out. Again, just a few big tears. Got up. Kept running…

Let your feelings out

When I get rejected and feel hurt, I don’t cry. Instead, I immediately try to rationalize and minimize the impact. This keeps me from experiencing the sting as intensely. But I’ve noticed that the negative feelings seem to stick around longer. There are these little creeper feelings of doubt that hang in the back of my head and slow me down after a rejection.

Insight: With rejection, allow your feelings to come out right away (but after you have left the meeting.)

Keep moving

Insight: When you get rejected, same thing — keep moving. Keep everything flowing. Do not get stuck and atrophy in that moment.

Pick your feet up

Insight: Don’t look away from your target. When you are getting tired, don’t get sloppy. Slow down and lift your feet higher.

Remember, people aren’t looking (for long)

When I’ve been rejected, I tend to hang on to the story. I think it through and replay the events. I give the experience meaning and time.

Insight: Upon rejection, a quick inventory will do. No need to spend more time than the time needed to assess and learn. Then, move on. Just show up and be better, stronger and more focused the next time.


Want my help? — See me here: www.jackiecolburn.com

Sprint with Jackie

Sprinting to make change in the world one Design Sprint at a time.

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Jackie Colburn

Written by

Uncrushable Optimist. Strategist. Facilitator. Experimenter. Product Leader. Design Sprinter. www.jackiecolburn.com

Sprint with Jackie

Sprinting to make change in the world one Design Sprint at a time.

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