Chapter 8: The Mystery

“Is this the end” she said, I don’t think she asked.

“Why do you say so?” Not understanding her completely “I want us to be together forever”

“It is always the right end for the beautiful stories” She said looking at her untouched coffee.

“This is serious. Let’s not turn this into a prose or a work of art, this is real-life”

“You prove my point” “Have you ever felt like real life after meeting me, I have not” I know what she means.

“But… I don’t believe that love doesn’t last forever, it certainly does, what changes is the form of this love: from clear passion and acting on whims to the struggle to stay yourself, maintain the banalities which had become a part of each of our personalities, running in life at a speed which is comfortable to both. But, this love graduates, from passion to merging together to interdependence. Going through life together till being bored of life and a bit of each other too but, never enough to bid a goodbye, never a goodbye!

Let’s at least meet the families. I don’t know anything about your family”

She shook her head “Why are you stuck in these things. You talk about being different and thinking different from everyone else, but, the small things are now so big, because of your eternal need to comply” visibly irritated with me.

“No. But, I think that we should move ahead in our lives” I said.

“And this is moving ahead?”

“Do you always want to be looking over your shoulders?!”

“So this is the problem. You are scared that this might not last”

“Happiness always comes with a fear to common people like me, specially there is so much happiness at stake” I sighed. By now, my worst fears were becoming true. She did not intend to take this further. Or probably I don’t understand her and we are not meant for each other.

It was funny how a deep romance can see the end over a dinner, I thought, as she pulled her bag and started walking way from the table. Somehow somewhere, I couldn’t have imagined this as the end or any end to us. To me, this was just another fight. Not stopping her when she is walking away would have been wrong, but, leaving the food would have been criminal too. Letting my heart take the decision for us, I followed her to the door of the restaurant.

I do not understand how it happened.

But, the next second, I found myself surrounded by people and it hurt.

It was confusing.

I was unable to remember my journey from the gate of the restaurant to the middle of the road.

I recall her crossing the street and a vehicle, a big truck rushing towards her at high speed. Did I plunge to save her? This is what I recall or is it just made up by my mind. They showed me the street camera’s video shot. It shows me crossing the street, but, not running or plunging to save her, just walking fast. But, I recall the plunge, or Do I?! The most difficult part, there was no sign of her in the restaurant or on the road. She was just not there.

Is this some kind of joke?! Or some conspiracy. She did talk a lot against the government, people, corporations, but, it didn’t make sense.

In between all this confusion, I was really worried if she, if she was hurt. What if she was? I cannot waste time in all this. Every minute might be important. But, I wanted to get this out of the way quickly. It was a needless confusion of harrowing proportions.

To this over with, I let the cops check with my office. She worked with me. They could uncover whatever these cops are cooking. They say they don’t anyone by that name. I should have checked her employee code. My friends don’t know her either. Someone has either turned them or this is all a dream. How can they not know her? I am sure the two of us had gone out with my friends. Probably, not! We liked the company of each other enough to forget the whole world.

They tried her number, which turned out to be a ‘number which doesn’t exist’. I couldn’t prove anywhere that she exists. How could that be the question right now! Just How?!

I checked all her things at my place, her suitcase, her clothes. They say I had bought them. How ridiculous! Why would I do that! We went to movies together, we did so much together. “Where is she?! What is going on?!” Was I could could say, all I could think. But, this was not the time to lose myself. If there was someone on her side, someone who’s going to make an attempt to find her, that would be me.

The more I tried, the more attention I was drawing. I had started to look insane. I could really feel their stare. Why would they do that?! Where did she go? I had to stay calm if I wanted to find her in time. But, it was not believable that they would try to prove that she didn’t exist. Neither did it make sense that someone would go through so much and make everyone else a part of their plan in doing whatever he wanted to do with her. But, that can’t be that she didn’t exist for real!

Her home, I still remember that house, where I proposed her. I was smarter by now. So, I just sneaked out to see she is there at that house, without taking anyone else. I couldn’t find that house.I was the one who drove her there that day. How can it not be there? I think.. I think, someone very influential had worked against us. I don’t know what else could have happened? Could I really have gone insane?

Thanks to the insanity judgement of the people and the cops, I was really not detained. I think it would be better letting the world around me believe that I was insane. I need the peace to understand this, find her.

I could not forget for a second that she is depending on me to find her. So, I found a lawyer. A lawyer, who was amused by story and didn’t really need much money asked for the tapes for examination. He asked me about the gifts she got for me and checked for the credit card examination. All things that we generally do in detective TV shows. It might sound funny but it wasn’t.

Either everything from the restaurant was a dream or everything up to it.

I was too scared to know. I was not sure if I ever wanted to know. If it was a dream, I would clench my eyes and try and go back to the same dream again.

But, it felt so real, the love I had for her, the pain of seeing the eventuality of her meeting that car on the road. I could have thought of the driver as the culprit, the person who killed her, but, there was nothing, nothing.

Nothing about her, every little secret, nothing that belonged to her, was there. I couldn’t find anything. I needed one proof, of her existence, or my insanity.

It was as if she went away with everything, leaving nothing for me to remind of her.

I did search my whole house, found a lot of stuff there. But, they had to be there. She had moved in with me.

As days passed by, I wanted to know that I was insane and she didn’t exist. Because, if she did, she must be too hurt, in a condition that she needed me and I couldn’t be there for her. Or she is fine and is enjoying somewhere this checkmate with my sanity. It would be easier now if she didn’t exist.

That attorney was a nice guy, a nice old man, with a lot of pain and pity in his eyes. He looked at me, straight into my eyes and said that she didn’t exist with a disarming honesty. I couldn’t have questioned his judgement. He had allowed me to take the help of various detectives to find her. No one could find anything. Now, I hated her guarded nature. She hadn’t told me a thing about her family, her life before we met. But, somewhere I was happy that at least she was not as heartless to let me rot in hell like this when all she had to do was to be seen by everyone.

I was sitting alone in the house, now this place was my house, an institution for people like me. It struck me how my love in playground and this one, both had remained unfulfilled. They had found records of some doctor from my childhood too. They say there was no girl in the playground. But, that is not true. Not true! I hope not.

I don’t think they are lying. I don’t think there was any conspiracy. After a few days since the accident, she was always standing in a corner sobbing. She was there regardless of the visiting hours of the hospital. My first reaction would have been to check if she was okay, but, I shouldn’t talk to her. I would have proven their point. So, I kept mum. But, nobody could see her, other than me.

It is funny how I could love a ghost. She had to be a ghost. She kept saying ‘no! not ghost, I am just you, a part of you! This didn’t sound romantic anymore. It was scary.

This story is a part of the series called Alone. Please read the next chapter here: The end, or the Beginning!