Lead By Example, Not By Title
Nearly every day, we see examples of people who call themselves “leaders” play the part of “boss”, not “leader.” You can find such examples everywhere. Read the New York Times, The Washington Post, The Economist or pretty much any respected publisher and you’ll see examples of CEO’s, President-Elects and others attempting to govern from a position of power defined by title, rather than respect.
Younger generations are starting to believe that leadership means having to coerce others into doing things, to manipulate people, and forcing people to listen.
It’s true that some “leaders” govern by force, manipulation, obfuscation, and fear. Most of the time, such people are obsessed with titles, labels, and org charts. I’ve worked for such people. I’ve known and represented (as an attorney) such people — including many C-level executives at large corporations.
The best leaders lead by example, not by title. True leadership is not about coercion, manipulation or force. For far too long, people have followed management practices and principles defined decades ago for a very different society — and very different organizations, than the ones we have today.
Good leaders inspire people to work hard. Great leaders inspire people to do their absolute best. Whether you work in a start-up with very limited funds and small teams, or are the future President of the United States, it’s critical that people do their absolute best. Anything less is often economic (and often social) suicide.
Here are the core principles that guide me:
- Lead by example at all times. You’re not a true leader merely because of your title.
- Never stop learning — do whatever it takes to become a better leader.
- Use the right words. What you say as a leader always matters.
- Appreciate differences. Use people’s differences as a source of strength for the entire team.
- Motivate yourself. You cannot motivate others unless you motivate yourself.
- Collaborate with your team to innovate instead of pushing ideas on them.
- Empower people around you to succeed — give them responsibility and authority.
- Treat others with compassion and respect. Don’t just tell them they are important. Show them.
- Promote a collaborative culture where everyone is a leader.
It’s rare for a person to fully appreciate the intricacies of leadership. Each of us has made plenty of mistakes while learning to lead. Years ago, before I fully understood the importance of the above principles, I made a mistake during a team meeting. I was frustrated, and publicly took out my frustration on the person leading the meeting. My reaction was stupid. It was not leadership by example, much less good leadership. I ignored every principle I listed above. After the meeting, I talked to that person privately and apologized. And promised to myself not to do that again. Ever. What you say as a leader always matters.
I realize that there are examples of leaders who have reputations for abuse, humiliation, and conflict. Steve Jobs and Bill Gates reflect that leadership style. Yet they both built phenomenal companies and left incredible legacies. Still, their leadership style came at a cost, and more importantly, it was unique to them. Plenty of people can scream and humiliate their employees, but the outcomes from such conflicts are rarely positive.
So how do you avoid confrontations and especially situations when someone on the team is being confrontational or stubborn? Here’s what we’ve done at crowdSPRING and Startup Foundry. First — we try very hard to channel the confrontational and stubborn attitude of any person involved in a team discussion into a productive, constructive discussion about their own ideas or resistance to the ideas offered by others. Second — we talk privately to that person after the team discussion to tell them that we love their passion, their ideas and participation, and greatly value their input. And we also explain that how THEY react during a team discussion reflects on everyone. What THEY say always matters. What they do either fosters or detracts from a collaborative culture. We ask them to look at themselves as a leader (regardless of title) and to appreciate the impact they could have on the entire team — both negative and positive.
We do our best to use every situation to help others succeed. We do our best to use every situation to help others become a better leader. And we ask only that those people in turn, follow these same principles. Help others to succeed. Help others to become a better leader. There is no magic to building great teams and organizations. It’s hard work and it takes the efforts of everyone.
The above principles apply to every person in an organization because true leaders are not necessarily CEOs — they can be anyone and everyone. I’ve seen terrific interns earn the respect of teams who often forget the intern is still in school. I’ve seen young engineers earn the respect of people who have 2x to 3x their experience.
The best leaders lead by example, not by title. What example are you setting for your team?
About The Author
Ross Kimbarovsky is the Founder and CEO of crowdSPRING and Startup Foundry. You can connect with him on Twitter and LinkedIn.
