Failure Friday
The failures that launched my startup
FAIL #1
There was $3.10 in my checking account,I had no job, my room-mate had moved a girl in to the room we shared, so I was sleeping in my car (a red VW bug) … and I was flunking out of college. This was not a good time in my life. I was having fun, but I drank too much, and to be honest was a bit of a flake. Health issues with my mother and brother were an ongoing cause of distress, but my activities kept me from paying attention to them. A college professor had started a software company, and the lack of money made me ask for a job …..
FAIL #2
I had worked continuously for the last 720 days. The start-up had grown from 17 employees to 300. I had gained 30#’s, was really knowledgeable about a very small piece of code, and had disdain for all of the folks around me (newbies in the lingo of day). Was not happy, and felt trapped at the ripe ol age of 23. Oh yes, my girlfriend of 2 years (post fail#1) had just dumped me. My boss at the time was a freaked out one-upper, (You know that guy .. the one who says “anything you can do, I can do better” .. yeah that guy). My annual raise was $400 after a decent review . My efforts were bringing $1M/year into company, I was making $22K. Time to take a job in south Florida.
FAIL #3
Looked around the 4-way stop, and saw nothing but little white-haired old ladies. The only girls that would date me were unhappy chain-smoking chicks who drank as much as I did. A girl dressed as a geisha at a Halloween party started stalking me, and I had just watched two guys in their 70's with Jersey accents got into a fist fight in the movie theater line. My boss that I worked for was affectionately named “Jose — Hose B”, and had gold-cufflinks with a white shirt. The hallway of cubicles was endless, and there was a cloud of smoke hanging about a foot under the smoke-stained ceiling of flourescence. I worked all waking hours, was often last car in parking lot, first one in. I was 25, had 15 direct reports, and hated everything about my job and life choices. The future looked mighty bleak. It was time to get back to the west coast and writing some code..
FAIL #4
Was working by day as a coder, shaping surfboards at night, coaching swimming in between. Surfing was awesome, but I was always distracted, and often behind. Made life-long friends in spite of my flakiness. My boss at the coding job said to me “You don’t put as much effort in being great here as you do at becoming good at sand-vball or at surfing .. or to be honest as you do in anything else”. That was a brutal wake-up call. Time to work…
FAIL #5
Major relationship ended …. ‘Nuff said.
FAIL #6
Worked for a CEO who didn’t like me, couldn’t fire me, but it was not a great work relationship.I stayed for a potential pay day (lots of stock options). I was on the road 6 out of 7 weeks, with all of the travel perks that this brings. Lots of time in biz-class or FC upgrades. Cars meeting me at the foot of plane in Frankfurt to whisk me away to a flight to Torino or somewhere else. I was experiencing the world through hotel rooms, cab windows and cell phones. From the outside I looked very successful, but I was not coding, was not surfing and was not spending time with the people in my life that mattered. Time for a change .. which is how at the age of 48 I launched my first start-up.
My life has been shaped by failure. Each of these failure points resulted in a major success and opportunity. I found new jobs and careers, made life long friends, met my wife and became a father to young people who continuously amaze me. I started new lines of business, created companies, embraced and defined new technologies all because of failures. Although the failures above were particularly poignant for me, each of the journeys to create new technologies or companies was littered with ideas that did not work.
Failing no longer bothers me, as each and every grand or little failure has resulted in rebirth and has driven me to be more creative. Failure can cripple you or motivate you .. your choice.
