Unveiled Ignorance

The Ethical Eavesdropper returns with more gossip: this time, about a sporting event fraught with foul play.

A cheating scandal at Netball?

we don’t negotiate with terrorists

This is a story. A story of betrayal, hurt, defeat and ultimately the strength to overcome such. We begin at the UQ netball courts, the very first game of the UQPPES Monday Night Leviathots. It appears to be an excellent match. Sweat is running, people are cheering and heroes are being made. What came next, however, no one ever expected.

Playing against a team of Med students had its pros and cons: no injuries occurred, but they were extremely competitive. As tensions rose, their level of need, desperation and superiority made them do the unthinkable. One representative of the med student team came over to our side of the court during the 3rd quarter (quite literally the final hour), saying ‘We need the score sheet, we were supposed to have it.’

Shocked, our (should be paid tbh) scorer Margaret was BAMBOOZLED. Never in her 20 years of netball has anyone ever said we need the scoresheet through the game, especially when they were losing by a close three goals. Suspiciously, the med student took the clipboard and walked to the other side of the netball court… away from the Leviathots prying eyes.

What was going to happen? Would we accept this suspicious behavior and attempt to control the game? Alas, our PPE skills of critical thinking came to good use. We scored on our own terms and closely watched the med student comfortably clutch the clipboard.

Final quarter bell rung, and we held our breaths in anticipation of the final score. By our count it was 14 (us) to 12 (them)…

But their botched scoring revealed a 14 all draw.

IMPOSSIBLE! SHOCKED! INFURIATED!

How could this happen? Cheating at UQ social netball?

Our incredible and tough-as-nails head coach Maggie walked over to the umpire and recounted the story. Thankfully, the umpire was a roommate of a PPE student, Phoebe. This saviour of an umpire gave our coach a wink and said, ‘don’t worry, they seemed very suspicious and it is odd to ask for the scoring during the game’.

The final score was 14 (us) v 13 (them). A compromise. And we don’t negotiate with terrorists. They should be warned: we will be back. Stronger. Angrier. And ready to beat them so comfortably they could never dream of fudging the score again.

This article was written by the Ethical Eavesdropper.

Please leave a comment below, or you might just be the next target x