Showing Up Fully Me at Work
I decided to make a verbal proclamation whenever needed to ensure everyone understands how I’m showing up.
It shouldn’t be a big deal but I’m learning it is. When share my proclamation, I see the entire white around the pupil of the listener’s eyes by the time I finish my apparently shocking statement. Here it is:
When I arrive at work, whether in person or virtually, I’m not only an employee. I’m Tash. Being Tash means I show up everyday with attributes that make me ME. No part of me is being shed as I walk through the door. Here’s a partial list:
I’m a woman.
I’m Black.
I’m a wife.
I’m in the throes of perimenopause.
I’m overweight (battling body weight issues since childhood).
I’m continuously monitoring a decades-long struggle with anxiety.
Now, read that list once more. Which of those attributes can I “turn off” when work begins each day? Which lived experiences can I shed from 8AM to 5PM Monday through Friday? Can I choose each morning to put on my athleticism cape and suddenly have boundless energy that shows up in a size 6 dress? How about turning off hot flashes and brain fog during work hours? Or, maybe leave my ethnicity and race in the car before I head into the building so it doesn’t get in the way of my work.
You see where this is going, right? It’s absurd to expect people to show up as only the parts of who they are that are comfortable to accept, and still be a strong performer. It is the plethora of attributes and lived experiences each of us has that makes us one of a kind. That’s what fuels an employee’s unique perspective that leads to a multi-million dollar cost-saving idea, an innovative marketing strategy, or their transformational leadership that creates a high-performing organization.
To be clear, I don’t intend to come to work and focus all day on the fact that, in the past, I’ve been labeled as emotional, angry and unprofessional perhaps because I’m an overweight Black woman willing to openly express compassion and disagreement. Though if I believe I’m being mistreated, I’d certainly address it. Creating space for people to show up fully doesn’t mean anyone gets to abdicate their responsibility to get the job done. On the contrary, it means we can get the job done leveraging all the skills, experiences, and learning we have to contribute.
I’ve become adept at having difficult conversations with care as a result of my lived experiences as a Black woman. It’s because I endured anxiety that I can see beyond the surface and identify colleagues who need support. Because I’m a wife, I’ve learned how to negotiate, collaborate and compromise which is what I do well at work every day. Asking me to leave any of that at the door ensures you won’t get the best of me.
In 2024, let’s heighten our practice of inclusivity and welcome all that we have to gain by inviting others to show up as their fully authentic selves.
