My newborn will only sleep in my arms. I’m exhausted!
At Stork, we know all about the difficulties when it comes to newborn sleeping. Our newborn experts are experienced postpartum doulas that have worked with thousands of new parents with sleep issues. Here we’ll outline our expert recommendations on how to get your newborn to fall asleep not in your arms:
With Stork, first-time parents get one-on-one access to experienced postpartum doulas for virtual, around-the-clock newborn support. At Stork we know what it’s like to come home from the hospital and have that “oh sh*t” moment when you realize those hospital nurses didn’t follow you home.
When your baby is a newborn, we do whatever we can to help the baby sleep. Rocking, swaddling, walking around the house… and so on.
It is common for parents to adopt methods to help their baby sleep that don’t include teaching them to sleep independently, for example co-sleeping or holding the baby the entire time they nap. It often gets to the point though, that babies don’t sleep well despite this constant attention…leaving both the caregivers and the baby exhausted. In addition, many of the soothing techniques that you use to try to get the baby to sleep actually work against helping your baby sleep independently.
The idea is to teach your baby how to sleep without being held. The challenge is coming up with a strategy, and teaching them they are safe and secure in their crib versus your arms.
Associations
Babies make strong associations with repeated behavior. You smile…they learn to smile back. They cry — we feed them to stop them crying. When they are tired, if they are held to fall asleep they will learn to make the association: “I am tired therefore they will hold me”.
What helps is if you change that association.
This will take some practice, especially if your baby has a developed a strong association of only being able to sleep while being held
As first time parents it is normal to have a million questions. It can be difficult to know where to look, and what sources to trust. Wouldn’t it be nice to have one place to start, every time, no matter the question? That’s why we built Stork.
Tips
- To start, gently place your baby in their bassinet or crib when they are asleep. This needs to be done consistently, every time they go to sleep, so they will learn to associate the crib or bassinet with sleep.
- If they wake right away, do your best to soothe them, then place them back in their crib or bassinet
- It will take some time — especially if you have waited a few weeks to do this — but with time, and patience, they will learn.
- It is very helpful — for naps and for sleep — to have a dark room and a sound machine to block out light and noise
- When creating this new habit, results won’t be instant, but try to stay committed. With a little time, and patience, your baby will learn that they need to sleep in
Traditionally, postpartum doulas cost about $1,200/week. At Stork, we’re working to democratize access to these newborn experts to make this service accessible for all families. Using technology, we’re able to offer one-on-one virtual newborn support at one twelfth the cost of traditional support.
You’re not in this alone. We’re here to help. We are so confident you’ll be blown away by your experience with Stork that we offer the option to cancel your subscription anytime.
