The story behind Pakistan’s first children’s book that is here to help educate about child abuse
Child abuse is an ugly reality of our society. Whenever an incident makes it to mainstream news, there is a lot of noise made around the issue and claims of justice for the next few days and then the cycle repeats itself. The most we get to see are some cosmetic changes instead of some concreate measure that can ensure that children can be protected.
Another aspect around this issue that is ignored is the lack of conversation. After all that we have seen and heard, child abuse is still treated as a taboo. Ashhad Ahmed Qureshi, a young Pakistani based in the United States has broken this circle of silence and has written a children’s book in Urdu to help educate kids about sexual abuse.
Talking to Mashable Pakistan about what motivated him to write this book, he said; “The driving force behind the book was the countless heartbreaking stories that I had heard from friends and family or my work on the sexual assault hotline of children being sexually abused and having no access to the support they deserved and needed.”
In addition to these external stories his personal experience also added to the determination of doing something about the issue as he believes that he is among the privileged few who got the support that he needed to heal and the majority are not so lucky.
“My story is one of them. As a child, I was sexually abused for years by someone in my extended family. I remember how confused and helpless I had felt. I had so badly wanted to do something about it but I didn’t know what and I didn’t know how-I had never had these conversations about body boundaries, personal space, or safety planning with my parents before or anyone else for that matter. I was not the exception: these conversations were (and still are) taboo and highly stigmatized. But my story is just one of countless others. I was privileged in that when I was able to finally disclose to my parents, I was able to get the support I needed to heal, but I know many others are not so lucky. This is why I wrote this book-it is a book I wish I had had growing up. And I dedicate this book to all survivors out there, those who are finally able to live freely, those who are still struggling, and those who are still suffering silently. I hope all of us can recover and live the lives of happiness, love, respect, and support that we deserve.”
The creation of this book was a necessarily arduous process because he wanted to make sure that he does justice to the subject, given its sensitivity and prevalence in our society. His work experience with the hotline helped train him to deal with the subject but he didn’t just rely on it and ended up doing his independent research as well, especially focusing on reading existing literature for children that was available in various countries and making notes on what he wanted his book to include or exclude.
“Most of what I read though, was not suitable for a Pakistani context. Not even the language could be translated to Urdu easily. We don’t really have words in Urdu for personal space, body boundaries, and so on, at least not for everyday use. You can translate them for sure, but it would not carry the same meaning. I had to really think about how to convey the same concept but in a way that would be understood by everyone.”
Once he was done with his manuscript, he contacted Fahad Khan, Programme Manager at Community Engagement Center at Indus Health Network at the time, with whom he had worked in the past. He allowed Qureshi to work with his talented team of clinical psychologists, mental health workers, and public health experts. Qureshi led a workshop with this team where they scrutinized every word of the book, discussing if it is simple to understand, culturally appropriate, respectful of people’s beliefs, are there better ways of conveying the same concept and so on.
“Ashhad has been able to break down a very complex and much needed conversation about consent into a simple and easy to read resource for children and parents alike.” — Fahad Khan.
After making all the necessary changes, the manuscript was sent to underserved areas in Karachi, where the community members (who would hopefully read this to their children in the future) provided their feedback.
The illustrations were developed by Aziza Ahmad, who has really brought the book to life.
“Even this was a lengthy process. I wanted to make sure each illustration was intentional; the characters in the book needed to be representative of the community they were for. And fortunately, Aziza and I were always on the same page; she had the same vision for the book as I did. During the illustration process, individual illustrations were also field tested with mental health workers and community members, who provided insightful feedback on how they wanted the characters to look like.”
The editing process for “Mera Jism Mera Ha” was continuous. Once the manuscript and illustrations were complete, the content was vetted by Dr Syed Arshad Husain, a renowned child psychiatrist. The language was further evaluated by Timsal Masud, the distinguished Urdu writer and professor.
Next came the stage of finding a publisher and given the subject and the intended target audience this too was not an easy task.
“Many publishing groups were not accepting manuscripts at the moment, and many were reluctant to publish a book on a taboo subject.”
In the end Daastan Publishers were brave enough to team up with Qureshi to not only ensure its publication but also worked tirelessly to ensure that it reaches as many people as possible. This book is a call to action, to educate ourselves and our kids and to stand up for the survivors.
“I want everyone to know that this book is for a cause greater than myself. It simply adds to the work of countless individuals and organizations who wish to eradicate sexual abuse and the stigma around it.”
Qureshi’s ideal vision for the book is to have it incorporated into school curricula, as part of community outreach by NGOs, and hopefully have it become a household read for young children growing up in Pakistan.
“I am thankful to so many people-family, friends, strangers, strangers who became friends-who went above and beyond to make this project possible. With the amount of love and support I have received from so many people around me, I am confident that together we can make a difference.”
Talking about the book and the work that went into its publications, a couple of individuals who have been a part of this effort also shared their opinion with us.
Zahra Sarmad, Psychologist at the Mental Health Department at Interactive Research and Development said; “Ashhad took an amazing initiative in the form of this book. I have worked with children and have seen how a lack of understanding regarding body boundaries is opening channels to violation of their bodies and souls. It was an amazing experience to help develop this resource. I hope it reach the masses to enhance awareness and impart skills.”
“It was a great and different experience to work on this book for me although I have worked for sexual and reproductive health and rights. However, that work was limited to urban communities. The most interesting aspect of this book is the scope of its reach. Child abuse is a global issue and unfortunately in Pakistan it is still considered taboo and because of our shyness to address the issue, the problem is on the rise. Through this book we can empower the mothers and children and this can prove to be the first step in the right direction to deal with the issue.” — Bilquees Idrees, Outreach Coordinator at Indus Health Network.
Shahida Quraish, Programme Assistant at Indus Health Network shared; “It was really a very unique experience for me to introduce the concept of this book to the community because as a citizen of Pakistan, I think it is a basic need to introduce this kind of book to our education system because it is in pictorial form so kids can easily understand it themselves or with the help of their teacher. The topic of book is very bold because sexual harassment and abuse in (specially in kids) Pakistan’s workplaces, including schools and madrassas, is pervasive, mostly unreported and ignored by the management. Kids also want to hide this from people, the reason being that our local community does not want to talk with their kids saying, ‘K abhi wo chota hai aisi batain nahi kerni chaheyai, kya sochaga waghaira waghaira’. If we introduce this book to communities, they can easily understand by pictorial form and it will be very helpful and fruitful.” — Shahida Quraish, Program Assistant at Indus Health Network.
Originally published at https://pk.mashable.com on July 6, 2020.
