Rosa’s Piece

Directors Statement —

I have always been a very idealistic person. I want everything I do to be perfect and up to standards held by myself and everyone else around me. This manifested itself when I was a kid through piano. I played piano for about 8 years. One piano instructor I had required us to perform recitals and festivals twice a year, and I still remember the intense anxiety I felt before each performance. I feel the same anxiety today when I perform or share any sort of creative work that I have done.

With this film I want to explore that anxiety, and what gives artists their courage. What I have heard most often is that you can do nothing more than your best. I hear “just do your best!” time and time again from teachers and mentors, and over the years I have found that that mentality does not work for me. In my own experience, doing your best likely means doing nothing at all. When I start to feel very anxious, I often think that the state of my work is so terrible that doing nothing would yield better consequences than sharing anything. So, in this film, I wanted to avoid “do your best” at all costs, and present different ways of finding courage or getting motivated. At the beginning of the film, I hint at the importance of practice and remaining in the present moment during your creative process. All work takes patience, and you shouldn’t get too far ahead of yourself. But the turning point takes form in my main character, Rosa, finding her courage through someone else: a pianist who is visually impaired. This student both inspires Rosa and makes her realize how small her problems and anxieties are compared to the student’s. This is not the only way to manage your anxiety, and I think that Rosa got lucky with the student’s presence in this particular instance. I hope that the audience realizes that “do your best” is not the only motivator in a creative process, and that even if you think that what you are putting out there will be absolutely terrible, you should do it anyway.

Most of this story is inspired from my own experience and life. Rosa and Jordan are coexisting, yet conflicting, sides of myself. I know an engineering student who is visually impaired, and he is a very courageous person and never lets his eyesight get in his way. I also drew a lot of inspiration from Whiplash. My film does not reach anywhere near the same level of intensity that Whiplash does, but both characters face anxiety and doubt in performance. Rosa’s equivalent of Fletcher exists in her own head, although that side of her may not be as abusive as Fletcher was to his students.

The goal with this film is to both help myself work out my own anxieties, and to open up doors in the viewer’s minds about what it means to be brave in the face of anxiety.

FADE IN:

INT. PIANO PRACTICE ROOM — DAY

ROSA (20) sits at the PIANO. She holds her head between her hands, with her elbows resting on the piano. Her friend, JORDAN (20), sits behind her. Her feet are up on a chair and she is reading OUTLIERS by Malcolm Gladwell.

Silence fills the room.

Rosa takes a deep breath, and sits up straight. She plays perfectly, seemingly very calm and collected. She finishes the piece and her shoulders droop. Her posture returns to a hunch.

She slowly turns around on her bench and looks at Jordan. Jordon looks up from her book. Rosa looks miserable.

JORDAN: What’s the matter with you?

Rosa gets up from her bench and paces back and forth. Jordan watches her, confused. Rosa stops and turns toward Jordan.

ROSA: I’m gonna fuck this up so bad, dude.

JORDAN: What are you talking about? You just played it perfectly.

ROSA: Yeah, but that doesn’t matter. I’m gonna get up there in front of all

those people and I’m gonna fuck it up.

JORDAN: I doubt that very much.

Rosa plops down back on the bench. Jordan puts down her book and sits up.

JORDAN: Okay, so lets say you fuck it up. What happens then?

ROSA: I die.

JORDAN: Okay, so you die. So what?

Rosa looks up at her, shocked.

ROSA: What? It’ll be so embarrassing. I’m gonna disappoint myself and my family and friends. All of those people are gonna think that I am some piece of shit because I can’t get through one piece without messing it up.

JORDAN: Yeah. They might think that. They also might not even care that much. Either way, everyone’s life is going to continue and soon they won’t even remember that they went to your recital.

Rosa sits there for a minute, thinking.

ROSA: I can’t do it. I would rather play it perfectly or not at all.

JORDAN: Well, thank God you don’t have to do it right now.

ROSA: What are you talking about? The recital is tomorrow.

JORDAN: Yeah, it’s tomorrow. Not today. Right now you’re just practicing. Play it again.

Jordan returns to her book. Rosa stares at her for a moment, before turning back around to the piano to play again.

INT. BACKSTAGE OF THEATRE — DAY

A group of nicely dressed students are wandering around backstage. Most of them are talking with each other. Rosa sits at a table, hunkered over her music. Her leg bounces and she bites her nails.

Jordan enters and sits opposite of Rosa. She wears a nice black dress and carries music.

JORDAN: Hey man, how are you holding up?

ROSA: Awful. I’m so nauseous, I feel like I could hurl at any moment.

JORDAN: Good, good.

After a moment, PIANO MUSIC fills the theatre.

JORDAN: Woah.

Rosa lifts her head, with a look of utter disbelief.

ROSA: Jesus. That sounds so good. Oh my god.

Rosa places her face in hands. Jordan continues to listen in awe.

ROSA: How am I supposed to follow this? It’s going to be a disaster.

INT. BACKSTAGE OF THEATRE — DAY (LATER)

APPLAUSE fills the theatre. Rosa stands, looking towards the curtain. The previous PIANIST steps through the curtain. She holds a WHITE CANE in front of her. She finds her seat, and several STUDENTS come over and congratulate her.

Rosa stares at her, slack-jawed. Jordan stands next to her, equally surprised. She looks at Rosa, and puts a hand on her shoulder.

JORDAN: You’re on, dude.

INT. THEATRE — DAY

Rosa steps out from behind the curtain and onto the stage. The piano has a spotlight on it, and the audience is barely visible from the stage. She walks in front of the piano bench and bows.

ROSA (under her breath): Fuck.

She rises from her bow and smiles. She turns and sits down at the bench, staring at the keys in front of her. She fidgets with her hands as she takes a long breath. After a moment, she puts her hands on the keys and plays.

FADE OUT