RECIPE — What Kind Of Amateurish, Uninspired, And Lackluster Recipes Have We Got Here For The Trader Joe’s Customer Choice Awards Winners?

Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first. — Ernestine Ulmer

RECIPE — What On Earth Is This Sorry Excuse For A Pasta Dish With Walnut Parsley Pesto?

Oh, the horror of having to work with Trader Joe’s Customer Choice Awards winners! I must say, these mundane products hardly inspire any culinary excitement. However, I suppose I can muster up a recipe using these lackluster items. Let’s see how we can elevate them from being just another grocery store’s so-called “best” products.

Recipe: Chili Lime Flavored Rolled Corn Tortilla Chips Queso Dip

Ingredients:

• 1 bag of Trader Joe’s Chili & Lime Flavored Rolled Corn Tortilla Chips
• 1 cup of shredded cheddar cheese
• 1/2 cup of milk
• 1 tablespoon of flour
• 1 tablespoon of butter
• 1/4 cup of diced tomatoes with green chilies
• 1/4 cup of diced jalapeños
• Salt and pepper to taste

Instructions:

1. In a saucepan, melt the butter over medium heat.
2. Add the flour and cook, stirring constantly, for 2 minutes to make a roux.
3. Gradually whisk in the milk and continue cooking until the mixture thickens.
4. Reduce the heat to low and stir in the shredded cheddar cheese until melted and smooth.
5. Stir in the diced tomatoes with green chilies and diced jalapeños. Season with salt and pepper to taste.
6. Transfer the queso dip to a serving bowl and serve with Trader Joe’s Chili & Lime Flavored Rolled Corn Tortilla Chips.

Wine Pairing

I’d recommend pairing this uninspired dish with a bold and spicy Zinfandel from Ridge Vineyards. The wine’s robust fruit flavors and peppery notes will provide a much-needed contrast to the lackluster flavors of this recipe.

Now, let’s hope that this recipe manages to eke out some semblance of flavor from these uninspiring Trader Joe’s selections.

RECIPE — What On Earth Is This, A Sad Excuse For A Cobbler?

Bon Appétit

If you’ve managed to survive the Trader Joe’s Customer Choice Awards winners without falling into a pit of culinary despair, then you might have some semblance of taste buds left. Are you yearning for more thrilling culinary escapades that don’t involve mediocre grocery store offerings? Then, by all means, subject yourself to further punishment by hitting that subscribe button. Or, if you’ve miraculously stumbled upon the secret to elevating these mundane products to a level of palatable satisfaction, feel free to share your wisdom. Or don’t, because let’s face it, there are better things to do than discuss subpar grocery store items.