Leadership is like Driving a Car
Leadership is a lot like driving a car. There are often three ways people try when leading for the first time. Those three ways are passive, aggressive, and calculated. In the car world, when you approach a slow car, you are either the person who gives five car lengths of space, the tailgater, or the person who gives two car lengths of space. (Based on three car lengths being the recommended distance on non-highways.) Here is how these approaches work in the real world.
1) Five Car Lengths — Passive Leadership
This example is the overly emotional leader who sees the problem and decides that backing off the person will solve the problem. The belief is that car (or employee) will eventually see that they are holding up everyone else and will ultimately speed up without further intervention. The “leader” doesn’t want to anger anyone, so instead, backs off completely to “lead by example.” Instead, cars start tailgating the driver, thinking they are now the problem.
In business, as in driving, you will often receive a strong push back by doing this. Over time, your team will lose trust in your ability to lead when it’s decision time. The group sees you as the problem now by not showing who the leader is.
2) The Tailgater — Aggressive Leadership
Next, you have the person who thinks that it is their mission to make sure the driver speeds up. In business, this is the person walking around telling everyone, “I’m the boss” and “because I said so!” They will remind you of every little flaw you have and demand that you fix them without suggesting how.
It is routine to see this happen in Massachusetts, where I live, in both business and on the road. Everyone thinks they are the most important person once they get into their vehicle. Get off my road!
The big-name tech companies here are often known for their “toughness.” They are cutthroat and often brag about why they disciplined or fired someone. It is usually a stat that is encouraged on resumes. I’ve seen it listed in job requirements on listings before.
Coaching is rare, and lessons seldom learned. The team operates as a dictatorship. It will not work in the long run.
3) Two Car Lengths — Calculated Leadership
Finally, you have the calculated driver who maintains a specific distance to encourage the driver to speed up just a little, maybe. A business example is when a boss suggests a change but lets you make the ultimate decision. The employee/driver has the room to decide without you jumping down their throat. However, they are aware that you are watching patiently.
In business, this is the leader who leans toward coaching over discipline whenever possible. Instead of yelling or demanding, this is the person who genuinely wants to help you get better. They are investing in the employee’s long term growth, teaching him/her to be a leader.
Calculated leadership is rare due to the amount of time and self-awareness that needs to take place to be successful. You have to experiment and learn to lead each person individually. You can then develop a team of leaders.
Once you reach a leadership position, remember that you still need to grow. Your job is an acknowledgment of your skillset but not a final destination in your growth. You will need to earn the title every day. Develop other leaders around you as you go. There can never be too many leaders if you do it the right way.
Massachusetts residents aren’t known for their excellent driving skills, so what do I know?
