Limiting, destructive self-talk about a new endeavor

There is an area of ourselves that is usually hidden from everyone else but for us is very familiar, we are used to the words: our limiting, destructive self-talk that turns on while we are relaxing at home, on our cozy sofa, in our tempting comfort zone. The words are amplified when you are about to start something new — as with me starting this blog. Listen. What does your self-talk say about a new endeavor?

Mine looks like this:

• I am not good enough to write about this topic.
• I do not know enough to write about this topic.
• There is probably somebody else who could write better than I do.
• People know everything I write about already.
• and a lot more.

Write about your self-talk, learn about your resistance on another important issue you have in your life now:

• a project you just started,
• your relationship with money,
• your behavior in relationships,
• a mistake you just committed,
• finishing the sentence: “I could have done better / I should have known better…”
• in relation to an emotion, such as anger, disappointment, unhappiness, pain, distress or something else that is common in your life and would like to change.
• any other topic your self-talk is very active at?

Now flip it around and make a positive, reassuring sentence.

Here is my list:

• I have tried many of these exercises myself or have given as assignments to my coach clients. My experience is that my questions and inspiration can improve the quality of others’ lives. They certainly improved mine.
• I have 20 years of experience I can draw from.
• Writing is a skill that needs practice to develop. I am in the process of learning.
• I have not found an English site so far (please let me know if you have!) that deals with the same topic.

Self-talk is part of us. You have the capacity to change it if you want. Catch yourself when you hear the familiar words coming in the way of your development, and change them to your new words that support your pursuit. After writing down, try saying them out loud. Can you imagine to say them to somebody? Can you really say them to somebody?

Can you leave your sofa?

This post first appeared on my blog.