Helping Handle the Shitty Situations
The 2016 Get Busy Living Caregiver Award Winner on what winning this award meant to him
The Get Busy Living Caregiver Award celebrates a caregiver** of a young adult cancer patient, fighter, or survivor, who has provided an outstanding level of care and support to their survivor, while finding their own unique way to get busy living and exemplifies the spirit and energy of the young adult cancer movement.
Know someone who deserves this award? Nominate them today.
Dan Crail won the 2016 Get Busy Living Caregiver Award. We asked him recently what winning this award meant to him.
I was asked to write what winning the 2016 Get Busy Living Caregiver Award meant to me. I’ll start with what it doesn’t mean. It does not “make it all worth it.” It doesn’t make me look fondly back on our cancer journey, or that anyone should look to me as a role model.
For those that don’t know me, my wife was diagnosed with colon cancer, six weeks after our second son was born. Our oldest son was two years old, we both work full time, and led typically busy lives. So cancer was the last thing either of us thought would disrupt our ‘routine’.
“It does not ‘make it all worth it.’”
So, when the surgeon gave us the news, “So… Yeah, it’s cancer. We’re going to go in, get as much as we can, and I’ll see you in the waiting room in an hour or so,” it was a complete shock.
“And then they wheeled the love of my life into the operating room. Leaving me, literally, lost in the winding hallways of surgery prep.”
I tried to say, “It’s going to be okay,” to Liz, while they injected happy drugs into her IV. And then they wheeled the love of my life into the operating room. Leaving me, literally, lost in the winding hallways of surgery prep. Nothing could have prepared us for that news, or for the next couple years of everything that comes with a cancer diagnosis.
So what does this award mean to me?
It means that somehow, I handled a majority of the shitty situations in a manner that was ‘okay’, or maybe a little better than okay. I continue to feel that I’m not even close to a perfect caregiver. But, winning this award meant that I’m a little more comfortable with the title.
“It means that somehow, I handled a majority of the shitty situations in a manner that was ‘okay’.”
I was incredibly honored just to be on the same stage with the other finalists; finalists who I have become friends with, and who truly understand what it means to be a caregiver.
It has also meant that I’m a little more confident volunteering advice, and I am emboldened to continue volunteering my time and energy to helping other caregivers, and survivors.
“It has meant that I can look at my wife and know that all of my bumbling and learning as I went through the process, actually helped her…”
It has meant that I can look at my wife and know that all of my bumbling and learning as I went through the process, actually helped her, and us, get through some of the hardest times.
It means that I can confidently say that something I have done or said has helped another caregiver’s journey (in the words of MZ) ‘suck a little less.’
To that end, I would encourage all caregivers, and survivors to Get Busy Living!
**Nominees must be US residents over the age of 18, and is a caregiver to a young adult cancer survivor/patient, who is currently over the age of 18 and was diagnosed before the age of 40 (may be bereaved) who are registered for and will attend CancerCon 2017 to be held April 27 — April 20 in Denver, CO. (See official rules for more information)
