The Survivor (Thriver) Series ~ Brandi L. Benson: #22
SC: Tell us your name and where you are from:
BB: My name is Brandi Benson and I am from Savannah, Ga.
SC: Tell us about yourself. What do you do for a living or what do you want to do?
BB: I am an American Speaker, Author, and Founder of a premier employment service company, Resume-Advantage. I am a former U.S. Army Soldier who is now an author of the acclaimed book “The Enemy Inside Me” and I have been featured on radio, tv, magazines and international media platforms including ABC, NBC, CNN, Fox, CW, New York Journal, and more.
In 2009, after being diagnosed with a rare form of cancer, Ewing Sarcoma, I fought to overcome my diagnosis, heal after my treatments, and reclaimed my life through therapy, physical activities, and other healthy-living practices.
I live and work in Savannah, Georgia, USA. I am active in my community, taking part in organizations like The LiveStrong Foundation and volunteering time to individuals diagnosed with and recovering from cancer. Im also a board member for the Future Minds Literacy program and the Ella Foundation, an organization working to aid those who have been affected by violence, mental illness, and the criminal justice system.
SC: Are you a patient, survivor or caregiver (or combination)?
BB: I am a survivor
SC: Tell us your story:
BB: Life After Cancer — A New Perspective
Not every cancer survivor can see past the trauma of their initial diagnosis and the realization that something within their own body tried to handicap them. But every experience, good or bad, provides life lessons that serve as new guidelines for life. My own experience created a new rubric by which I now live and for which I am thankful. You may wonder how someone who watched her fellow cancer friends (patients) pass away one-by-one could be grateful for the very disease that stole them away? How does someone look past the torment, pain, and suffering to find transforming truth? I never thought or imagined I would be one of those survivors, but after battling Ewing Sarcoma (a rare, aggressive cancer found in the soft tissue), I can say I have learned a lot about myself and how deep I am willing to dig to live.
As a ten-year cancer survivor, I have been through life-altering events when it comes to my health and life after cancer. Survivorship to me is about evaluating the past, becoming fluid, and living for the future. When I speak at my events or meet newly diagnosed patients, I explain that life will never be the same. There will be a little, scared voice in your head that will always worry about the disease returning. I explain that what you know as your life now is gone and it will never return. But, as time goes on and you learn the new you, a fresh sense of normalcy is born. You gain your confidence back; your strength returns, and you feel more like yourself.
Through all the bone marrow biopsies, CAT scans, PET scans, MRIs, labs, the endless hours of chemo, the surgeries, and physical therapy, you will start to appreciate the lessons that cancer has taught you and the changes it’s embedded in you.
Ten years later, this is where I am in my survivorship.
Awareness of Time
The C word quickly affected my perception of time and how I validated it. A lot of us never really think about how much time we have left, but once someone puts an expiration date on your life, things quickly change. I went through a process of emotions — from being scared to being in denial, from upset to mad, then to impatient and easily frustrated. Within this process, the sensitivity for time kicked in, and I gained a new appreciation for the days I had left and how I wanted to spend them.
Greater Sense of Empathy
I gained an automatic sense of empathy and respect for everyone going through the treatment process for cancer; whether it was chemotherapy, radiation, or surgery, I felt their pain and despair and I became eager to share my story and experience, especially to those who were newly diagnosed. The need to comfort them and tell them that everything will be okay is still, to this day, a must. Since I’ve become the survivor, I speak a new language that I pray brings hope to others.
Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
The things that used to stress me out no longer hold a grip on my mind. I became aware that every moment in life is a special gift and that every breath holds even more weight. I gained an appreciation for the “Bigger Picture” and become more tolerant. Since having cancer, I have gained a carefree lifestyle and roll with the punches.
Stronger Then Before
Cancer is not only hard on the body, but you are tested mentally and spiritually as well. If you do not have a strong foundation in faith, one quickly forms. I dug deep to find the strength to live, and gained a sense of awareness that I’d never had before. Being a cancer survivor is a badge of honor to wear, but I would not wish this disease on anyone. Being pushed to the brink of death is scary, and not everyone makes it. But, because of cancer, I know I am stronger, mentally and spiritually. I have gained an insight to my life like never before because of this experience that nearly claimed my life.
Many areas of my life have significantly changed and may change for you as well. If I can offer words of advice from this side of survivorship: once you get that second chance at life, make the most of it and make it count like never before.
SC: What is the biggest lesson you have learned through this experience?
BB: That you’re stronger than you know and we have the last say so.
SC: What would you like to say to someone going through what you have gone through or are going through?
BB: My advice to someone who is going through treatment is to find a strong support system, laugh all the time and find something to live for.
SC: What do you do that brings you most comfort and joy?
BB: I have always been very active, but I have found myself very interested in nutrition and feeding my body the proper nutrition it needs in order to stay at a high alkaline level. A body that is high in alkalinity, will not get sick or harbor diseases.
SC: What motivates you to keep going, smiling, fighting?
BB: There are so many things that keep me going in life. The main one is setting goals and finding ways to achieve them. I never take no for an answer and failure is not an option for me. The second motivator is helping others in any area that I can. I am very passionate about helping others discover their worth.
SC: Any music, movies, books, art that have inspired you during your journey?
BB: When I was sick, I watched the Secrete a million times and read the book as well. I literally became obsessed with this concept and implemented it into my life and I am still practicing it till this day … ten years later.
I also started journaling, which later became my first book that I published called “The Enemy Inside Me”.“The Enemy Inside Me: A Memoir,” chronicles my experience being deployed to Diwaniya, Iraq, only to end my tour months earlier than expected, setting down my M16 and picking up the harsh treatments of chemotherapy. Basic training had taught me how to fight, how to use a gun, throw grenades, how to push past my physical limits, combat techniques and how to defend my country — but this was a different kind of battle. It crept upon me like a stealth enemy in the night. I was not ready for such an attack from within. I was only 24 when I was diagnosed, in a foreign place without the support system of the family I’d left behind. In addition to the very real attack on my body, my soul was also under a kind of attack. I ached for home, for something familiar. I was in the middle of a war and this very thought mounted great fear in my heart. In the midst of these attacks, I almost lost myself.
Through personal journal entries that include time stamps and locations, I revisit the critical moments from that period in my life, from discovering my tumor to being officially diagnosed and preparing my mind and body for treatment. These moments are peppered with emotional flashbacks that expose my fear of death and my thoughts on karma, as well as my struggling marriage and my investigation into the cause of my cancer. It is my hope that this book gives an honest representation of my thoughts and moods during this time, exploring the highs as well as the lows and holding nothing back.
SC: Do you have a favorite quote, mantra or saying that has helped you during your journey?
BB: Yes … “Never make a permanent decisions off of temporary feelings, events or situations”.
Everyone at Stupid Cancer would like to extend an enormous thank you to Brandi for sharing her story with us and the community.
Follow her on Instagram at: http://instagram.com/BrandiL.Benson
Together we are ending isolation and building community for those impacted by cancer.
