The Survivor (Thriver) Series ~ Marisa McGrody: #23
SC: Tell us your name and where you are from:
MM: Marisa McGrody, NYC
SC: Tell us about yourself. What do you do for a living or what do you want to do?
MM: I’m a photographer and I LOVE what I do.
SC: Are you a patient, survivor or caregiver (or combination)?
MM: Patient
SC: Tell us your story:
MM: I was raised in a happy home with so much love. I was told to never give up. My mother, Norma, raised me as a single parent. She worked very hard, showed me the world, taught me how to appreciate the small things, how to be a good friend, how important it is to give rather than receive, she made me understand and appreciate the arts and to be a great host and have wonderful celebrations… but most of all to always believe in myself!
As a child and teenager, I played sports such as volleyball and tennis, and I also loved to act. I suffered from mild form dyslexia and ADD. I had a hard time processing things, pronouncing certain words, and my grammar at times was off. And I still struggle with these things today. But I’ve never let it get in the way of who I am and what I have become and what I’m able to do.
On March 6th, 2016 I lost my mother to melanoma suddenly and unexpectedly. It was one of the most difficult life experiences I’ve ever had to endure.
Shortly after she passed away, my pre existing health issues got worse. I lost almost complete mobility in my right arm due to benign tumors caused by a health condition I have called neurofibromatosis. I thought to myself, I’m right handed, I love to play tennis, I love to cook and I’m a photographer. I had to figure out how to live and how to work very quickly and I did.
I’m still working as a photographer with just one arm. I love what I do and this is how I’ve been working for the last 3 years. One of my biggest accomplishments was capturing and completing the Sundance Film Festival in 2017.
Between the years of 2017 to 2019, I’ve had to undergo 5 major surgeries to remove various tumors in different parts of my body, and some of them have been cancerous.
It was a cool and sunny day on January 24th, 2019 when my phone rang, and I knew exactly who was calling…. one of my doctors, Dr. Yohay. I’ve been Dr. Yohay’s patient since 2010, and he has become family to me. When I heard his voice, I knew something was wrong. He called to tell me that the tumor removed under my right armpit was malignant and a serious concern and that would need a PET scan ASAP.
So that weekend I still enjoyed my time with my college roommates who came to NYC to visit me after a double surgery on January 10th. The 7 of us walked the Highline and looked back at my scrapbooks that I made each year I was at Providence College. We laughed, we cried and had some delicious spicy, mezcal margaritas.
On February 1st, I had my PET, and it was on February 4th when I found out from my other doctor, Dr. Akshintala, that there was already growth of a malignant tumor in the same area from where a tumor was just removed. And it was that day that I met with Dr. Pavlick who would become the one in charge of my chemo along side Dr. Cooper who would become my radiation doctor. Never in a million years did I think I would be lying in my mother’s hospital bed, and being there for her last breath, and only three years later be told I have cancer and begin receiving aggressive treatment. I know in my heart I would not be able to go through these medical endeavors if I didn’t have a loving, patience and strong fiancé. Its not easy for her, or for my extended family either.
I thought to myself, how does one loose the most important person in the world to her, to cancer, and now face this cruel devil disease? My mother was a kind, loving human and so am I. How is this all happening? And then I thought to myself… I have two very important choices, right? Don’t do treatment or do the treatment and fight like hell because you love your new family, your extended family, friends and life itself. So that’s what you do. You fight!
SC: What is the biggest lesson you have learned through this experience?
MM: I never realized how much courage and strength I have.
SC: What would you like to say to someone going through what you have gone through or are going through?
MM: I am here for you. How can I help you. Some days will feel like hell, some days you’ll feel ok, some days you won’t want to get out of bed, and some days you will want to go for a nice walk. And be gentle with yourself.
SC: What do you do that brings you most comfort and joy?
MM: Spending time with my loved ones. Cooking. Traveling when I can. Taking pictures, because I love what I do as a photographer.
SC: What motivates you to keep going, smiling, fighting?
MM: You fight for your fiancé, your step daughter, and your extended family. You fight because you want to still capture the world through your lens, mostly of people in communities that need help, for those who need to share their own stories and senior citizens. You fight because you want to be there for your fiancé and step daughter. You fight for your extended family and friends because you want to be there for them. You fight because there’s more to see and do and to cook. You fight because you love, love! But mostly you fight for yourself.
SC: Any music, movies, books, art that have inspired you during your journey?
MM: I love the app Calm. 90’s music. Listening to music by Ludovico Einaudi. The Podcast “Terrible thanks for asking.” The Met here in NYC. Cooking, and baking when I can. Going to the movies, and the theater. Watching certain shows that my fiancé and we love, such as “Jane the Virgin,” “Killing Eve,” “Brooklyn 99”, “Big Little Lies”, “The Food Network” . I cant wait to go back to the gym too.
SC: Do you have a favorite quote, mantra or saying that has helped you during your journey?
MM: My mother quoted Kahlil Gibran in her college yearbook. I didn’t know much about him, until I researched him. This is one of his quotes, that really hits home with me today. “Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.”
Everyone at Stupid Cancer would like to extend an enormous thank you to Marisa for sharing her story with us and the community.
Follow her on Instagram at: http://instagram.com/marisaerinphotography
Together we are ending isolation and building community for those impacted by cancer.
