How To Prepare For Therapy: 5 Ways To Get The Most Out Of Your First Session
Tips from a therapist.
You’ve made the leap and booked an appointment with a therapist. Congratulations on making your first big step towards self-improvement and personal growth.
As the day approaches, another problem emerges. What now? Indeed, getting the most out of your therapy experience requires preparation. Here are some things you can do to prepare for your first therapy session and your whole therapy journey.
An important note: this is a pretty long list, and you don’t have to do everything perfectly. In fact, you don’t even have to do any of it if you don’t want to — I know you’re already swamped by life, and I totally understand. It’s nice to have, but not expected of you.
1. Identify your expectations for therapy
Before your first session, it’s good to have an idea of what you expect of therapy. For how long, and how often do you want (or are able to have) therapy sessions?
When you think about this, it is good to be as specific as possible. For example, letting your prospective therapist know that you can only commit to sessions once in two weeks for the next twelve months will warrant a different treatment approach compared to someone who can commit once a week for the next three months.
If you would like more information on what you can expect from therapy, check out this introduction to therapy for a quick overview.
2. Identify your goals for therapy
Did you come to therapy to work on specific problems in therapy, or simply working towards a deeper understanding of your thoughts and feelings?
If you have specific goals that you want to work on, be ready to elaborate on them in as much detail as possible. When did the problem start? What are the day-to-day triggers for the problem (if any)? Is there anyone else involved? How has this problem affected your daily life? Have you attempted to resolve this problem on your own, and if so, what have you tried?
It is extremely common, and very understandable, to feel overwhelmed during sessions — especially the first one, when you’re talking about all the stuff that isn’t going right. Unfortunately, when we are emotional, we often leave important information and details out. That’s why coming to sessions prepared with vital background information can be so helpful in painting an accurate picture of the situation to your therapist.
That being said, don’t worry if you don’t have all the details or answers at this point. Remember, this is just a preparation — your therapist will ask you for anything else they need when it comes to the actual session.
3. Make a list of questions you want to ask the therapist
You’re also likely to have some questions of your own for the therapist. Perhaps you want to know more about their experience with clients like you. Or, you want to know whether they can recommend readings that might be helpful to your situation. It could also just be about how frequently you can expect to have sessions, and how long each session will be.
Jot these questions down, because believe me, after an hour of talking about what’s bugging you in life, it’s hard to remember to ask about these comparatively small, but important, details.
4. Mentally prepare to be open and honest
This applies to all sessions, not just to the first. It can be difficult to be open with someone you’ve met for the first time, but the more you share, the more your therapist can figure how best to help.
Therapists are trained to listen to your troubles and concerns without judgment, no matter how embarrassing or painful they may be. Your therapist is also ethically bound to keep everything you have shared in session confidential, so you can feel safe sharing troubles that you might typically hesitate to talk about.
If you still feel the tug of resistance despite your best efforts — that’s okay. I know you’re trying your best. It gets easier as therapy proceeds, when you and your therapist warm up more to each other.
5. Have patience and persistence
This is a tip for the first session, and will stay helpful throughout your journey in therapy. Remember, getting to know your therapist (and vice versa) takes time. Change is a process that takes time. Emotions need time to unfold and transform. Progress will take time, but when you keep at it, change will happen.
Another aspect of therapy that needs patience? Working things out with the therapist when something goes wrong. Just like any other relationship, you will sometimes feel frustrated with your therapist. Continue long enough, and you will experience some form of resistance towards your therapist.
That’s okay. This is progress. It’s a sign of a deepening relationship that makes it all the more therapeutic. The process of talking through such blocks and unhappiness with a therapist is, indeed, part of therapy. Even better if you’re someone that tends to avoid conflict and unhappiness — your therapist is the safest person to practice such difficult conversations with.
Conclusion
Preparing for your first therapy session — and thereafter — can help you get so much more out of your therapy experience. By clarifying your expectations and goals, listing your questions for the therapist, and mentally preparing yourself to be honest and patient, you will find yourself getting much more out of therapy and making meaningful progress.
If you have any other questions about therapy, feel free to leave a comment or email me at talk@superwellpsychology.com.
