I believe my application would be incomplete unless I tell you about my cousin Matt and his Mom, my Aunt KK. They have played a tremendous part in shaping me. Matt is nineteen, stands six feet tall, plays with Sesame Street toys and is addicted to Pepperidge Farm goldfish. He doesn’t speak and has a feeding tube for nutrition. He is my severely mentally disabled, autistic, and epileptic first cousin. He is also the happiest person I have ever met.
Matt was born eight months before me and currently resides at a residential home close to me called Melmark. Matt’s Mom, my Aunt KK, has been Matt’s sole caretaker since Matt’s father disappeared when he was diagnosed. It must have been incredibly difficult for her to watch her son grow parallel to me, and witness the difference in how we thrived. At the age of 6, we went dramatically different ways. He started down a path of intervention and education; doctors and hospitals were his life. I watched him suffer for years with seizures and surgeries. I, on the other hand, went from one grade to the next seemingly effortlessly. I made friends and played sports for three seasons. The unfairness has always stayed with me.
Matt’s latest diagnosis of Marfan’s lead to his most recent surgery of ‘spinal fusion’ at Dupont Hospital for children in Delaware. His incision runs from the base of his neck to the top of his tailbone. It was necessary to correct his rapidly advancing ‘scoliosis’. My Aunt KK sat by his side for weeks. Matt endured horrific setbacks, including infection and negative reactions to antibiotics. Through it all, Matt was ALWAYS happy and my Aunt KK, decisively positive. It is their nature, and now I try to exemplify that. I have a positive perspective on life and feel so blessed to be ‘normal’.
Being able to learn is a gift and I appreciate that gift every day. My body is strong and healthy; my mind is clear. I no longer take any of that for granted. My Aunt taught me how perseverance and courage can overcome anything. I believe everyone has something to offer. Because of Matt, I have tremendous patience and understanding for everyone I meet. I was taught the most by a young man that will never speak, and the Mom that spoke for him.
Our family has come full circle. Matt is recovering at Melmark, and my Aunt KK is recently happily remarried at the age of fifty. Matt finally has a Dad. As I look back over the last nineteen years, I realize that my problems are so small when compared to the problems Matt and his Mom face everyday. I can’t look at them and feel sad about anything going on in my life.
Matt, in particular, is special to me. I call Matt my gentle giant. He speaks with a smile that could light up anyone’s day. He jumps up and down and laughs uncontrollably when I go to visit him and giggles when we play hide and go seek. Matt makes me smile, and I am blessed to be able to do the same for him.
