Knowledge is your closure
Let education be the closure you need from a narcissistic person
Ending a relationship with a narcissist is like walking in a labyrinth without a clear exit sign. Many of us, including myself, who’ve found themselves in a toxic narcissistic relationship, struggle to break free because the narc never gives the closure we need.
The narcissist never takes accountability, never apologizes, and never fully exits your life. Lurking from a distance, they always manage to find a way back into your life, making sure you can’t move on.
Moving on is difficult for so many reasons. You don’t understand why they behaved the way they did, and your brain attempts to rationalize their actions or words. Doubt clouds your reality, and you no longer know what to believe after being gaslit throughout the relationship. Exhausted from constant worry and overthinking, you anxiously anticipate their next move.
I’ve been in this situation multiple times throughout my life. It wasn’t until I educated myself on the topic that I broke free from the repetitive cycle of abuse. I let knowledge be the closure I never received from the narcissist.
I delved into psychology books (“Surrounded by Narcissists” by Erikson and “Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare” by Shahdia Arabi), watched numerous YouTube podcasts (Dr Ramani and “Do The Work’’ podcast), and immersed myself in victims’ stories on Medium, all while still being in a relationship with the narcissist. But then I saw a light at the end of the tunnel — the more I educated myself, the easier it became to predict my narcissistic partner’s next move.
I became aware of patterns so quickly that I was surprised how oblivious I was throughout most of my toxic relationship. Temper tantrums lost their impact, manipulation techniques failed as I learned to identify them, and humiliation no longer hurt me.
I knew what would come next, and the relationship simply stopped providing the dopamine my brain unconsciously craved. I understood that after a high, a devastating low would always follow, rendering the highs valueless.
Knowing what I was going through and understanding that my narcissistic partner intentionally manipulated me became my closure. Knowledge turned out to be the key to breaking free from emotional abuse and humiliation endured for so long.
Let knowledge be your closure, but remember, knowledge without action is like a map without a destination — it won’t guide you to freedom. Transform that knowledge into a powerful force, liberating yourself from the shackles of narcissistic abuse.