How to ask strangers a question in Japan

Two tricks to elevate your spoken Japanese

When on a trip to Japan, I visited the small town of Karuizawa, an hour’s ride from Tokyo. While I had a great time there, I remember encountering difficulties finding my way back to the station. I had wandered well off the beaten path into a beautiful wooded suburb and my phone battery had died. On the street was a stranger, a middle-aged man sweeping leaves beneath a gate. It was contextually obvious that he lived there and since Karuizawa is not a very large town, I figured he’d know how to get to the station. I decided to approach him and ask him for directions.

「すみません」, I began, remembering to be polite, 「駅はどこですか？」

“Excuse me, where is the station?”

The man looked up at me with surprise.

“Um… I don’t speak English. Sorry.”

I remember feeling frustrated at the time, especially since I had asked the question in Japanese. It wasn’t the first time I had run into this situation with a stranger.

But, the problem wasn’t my Japanese or the individuals, per se. The problem was actually the phrasing of my question.

Cultural differences: interpreting directness

In Japan, there is a cultural expectation of respecting other people’s space and your station. In the English-speaking world, such expectations obviously exist, too; however, they manifest differently. For instance, asking a stranger: “where is [x]?” in English is not often interpreted as a transgression. However, in Japanese, phrasing is very important.

When I asked the man in Karuizawa where the station was, I had unknowingly committed a minor faux pas. The question’s directness (“Where is the station?”) implied that I was owed an answer and put him on the spot. He was probably uncomfortable with having to suddenly give detailed directions to a foreigner, a cultural context I wasn’t privy to at the time.

I later learned better ways to ask strangers questions.

ーんですが

There is a grammatical structure in Japanese that is extremely useful for politely asking questions or explaining one’s actions: ーんです.

When you attached ーんです to a sentence in Japanese, you are transforming your words from a mere statement to an implication. A bit different from English, right?

Let’s pretend you’re having a conversation in Japanese with a friend. Your friend notices that you’re tired and points it out. You can respond:

「昨日遅く働いたんだよね」

“I worked late yesterday… [that’s why.]”

In English, the implication is tacit; in Japanese, it is spoken.

So, let’s revisit my conversation in Karuizawa. Since I knew he was a local, I could have asked:

「すみません、駅に行きたいんですが。。。」

“Excuse me, I want to go to the station, but… [that’s my situation, can you help me?]”

Or, more generally:

「すみません、迷ってしまったんですが。。。」

“Excuse me, I’m lost… [that’s my situation, can you help me?]”

These questions are more respectful in Japanese because they give the listener leeway. I’m not demanding an answer; instead, I’m stating my situation. The listener can decide whether to help me or not (and oftentimes, they will!), which shows them that I respect their autonomy.

You can use んですが in all kinds of other situations: asking for directions to the restroom at a restaurant, reporting a stolen item to the police, and reserving a taxi, to name a few. But, what if you’re operating with less context.

In my situation, I was pretty certain that the man knew how to get to the station. He was a resident of the town and Karuizawa wasn’t large. But, what if we were in Tokyo and he was just some random stranger on the street? How would I know if he’d be familiar with the area? It would be a bit presumptuous to assume so, right?

ー知っていますか？

In comes the verb construction 知っている! If you’re learning Japanese in a classroom setting, you may have been told to be careful with this verb, as it’s easy to use it rudely. However, when asking random strangers questions, it is your go-to!

Let’s say we’re in Tokyo and we’re lost. We know we need to get to Kichijoji Station, but we’re not sure we can find the way. How do we ask a random stranger for directions? We could say:

「すみません、吉祥寺駅までの行き方を知っていますか？」

“Excuse me, do you know how to get to Kichijoji Station?”

Or, more generally:

「すみません、吉祥寺駅がどこか知っていますか？」

“Excuse me, do you know where Kichijoji Station is?”

While the questions are rather lengthy for a beginner, their structures are also fairly similar to how you would ask them in English. You are giving the listener room to say yes or no without making assumptions about them.

I hope this is useful for those of you new to Japanese! Equipping ーんです and ー知っている as parts of my vocabulary really helped my speaking ability. Hopefully, I won’t make the same mistake in the future.

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