A remote work revolution is needed at American companies.
In late January I received a call from the CFO of the mobile advertising company I had worked at for the past six years. “Times are tough. As a result, we’re going to have to let you go. Please know this isn’t based on performance…”
I was shocked. I had recently been promoted to a managerial role leading our west coast-based team of account managers. I loved my job. I loved my company, too, because I found the work invigorating and I was treated like an adult. I had flexible PTO so I was able to take time off whenever I needed it. I was able to work from home full-time which meant I could be there for my two daughters, one of whom has special needs. I was content to stay there as long as possible because I had great work-life balance and an enriching career.
This. Sucked.
I began looking for jobs that same day. I applied to companies in the same industry, most of which were based in New York. I assumed since these were tech-savvy companies operating in a newly-formed space they would be forward-thinking with regards to remote work.
I was wrong.
I had numerous screening interviews which always ended with, “I see you’re located in Maryland, are you open to relocation?” I would tell them I was hoping I could work remotely with frequent visits to their offices, that I had worked remotely for the past six years and had been promoted multiple times in that span. The common response was the same, “Sorry, we’re only hiring on location.”
I had numerous screening interviews which always ended with, “I see you’re located in Maryland, are you open to relocation?” I would tell them I was hoping I could work remotely with frequent visits to their offices, that I had worked remotely for the past six years and had been promoted multiple times in that span. The common response was the same, “Sorry, we’re only hiring on location.”
After a couple of months on the market, I took a job in the DC region and knew I’d made a mistake within a couple of weeks. My new job required me to be in the office 5 days a week without exception. There was zero work from home flexibility, even on an as-needed basis (for instance, when one of my toddlers was sick and sleeping on the couch all day.) I had limited PTO and no separate sick day policy. My commute, due to DC traffic, was 2.5 hours and 70 miles per day.
I quickly became frustrated, short-tempered, exhausted, and miserable. My wife works full time as well and we found ourselves struggling immensely with the challenges that dual-income households deal with on a daily basis.
Doctor, specialist, and dentist appointments for our kids and ourselves are only available during working, weekday hours. Our youngest’s preschool schedule is 9:30–12:30 three days per week. Our oldest has behavioral therapy every other Friday because they don’t do weekend appointments. If we want to enroll our youngest in soccer we have to somehow accommodate 3PM weekday practices. Our daycare opens at 7:30am and closes at 6pm. Our oldest’s IEP meetings are scheduled for mid-day.
Life in America hasn’t adapted to the dual-income household. School, activities, and places of employment maintain policies that were built around the single-income household where one person was a homekeeper and the other was a breadwinner. This dynamic hardly exists in America today as, per the Bureau of Labor Statistics, 63% of married households with children are dual-income.
What exacerbates these frustrations is the knowledge that accommodating remote employees isn’t difficult and the technology to do so is often already in-use by companies that aren’t open to remote work. Slack is widely used for in-office chat, Skype and Zoom are frequently used for video and audio communication between offices or companies and their clients, and finally email and texting are constant tools for in-office communication. These can easily be employed to accommodate remote work, but they frequently aren’t.
This leads me to believe that American companies like to ‘babysit’ their employees. They seem to think that if their employees were given increased flexibility they would be less productive, wouldn’t work at all, or that the quality of their work would suffer. They like to keep an eye on their employees to make sure they are working, which is really just a means of saying they want to ensure their employees are sitting at their desks all day. Rather than trusting the employees they’ve hired to do their work, they watch over them like hawks.
These policies are leading to major burnout in the American workforce. Americans report they are more stressed than ever, with half of millennial and gen z workers reporting they have quit jobs for mental health reasons, and it’s no surprise.
Consider my daily schedule:
- 5:15am — alarm goes off. Wake up. Shower. Brew coffee. Pack lunchbox.
- 6:15am-7:30am — Commute to work.
- 7:30am-4:30pm — Sit at desk and work. Take occasional bathroom and walk breaks. Get in minimal steps. No exercise.
- 4:30pm-6:00pm — Commute home. Evening traffic always slightly worse.
- 6:00pm — pick up kids at daycare.
- 6:15pm-8pm — get home, fix dinner, get kids ready for bed.
- 8pm-8:30pm — Fix kid’s lunches for next day, eat our dinner.
- 8:30pm-10pm — Watch TV, relax with wife. Go to bed.
My wife and I don’t have time for chores. We don’t have time to do laundry, clean dishes, vacuum the house, fold laundry, mow the lawn, clean the car, tidy up, go to the grocery store etc. I barely have time to spend with my kids. I’m exhausted because I’m not getting enough sleep. It’s demoralizing.
When the weekend comes my wife and I overwhelmed. We want to spend time with our kids, take them to the playground, expose them to new things, fit in a workout, and take care of chores. And it’s all too much.
When the weekend comes my wife and I overwhelmed. We want to spend time with our kids, take them to the playground, expose them to new things, fit in a workout, and take care of chores. And it’s all too much.
When I worked from home I was able to use short breaks in my work day to accomplish small chores that pile up over the course of a week spent away from home. I could fit in a run between dropping off my kids at daycare at 8am and start of the workday at 9am. If I had ten minutes before a call I could empty the dishwasher and start a load of laundry. I could take a five minute break and vacuum the crumbs my kids left all over the kitchen floor. I could water the flowers in the garden. Pick up toys. Fold the laundry. Start prepping dinner between the end of the work day and the 6pm daycare pickup time.
Because I had time to fit in these small chores and self-improvement activities throughout the day I had less stress and performed better in my job. I was able to spend more quality time with my family. I could be there for them for doctor’s appointments, school events, and extracurriculars. I was happier and healthier.
It’s time for American companies to broadly adopt remote work so that we can all have a better work-life balance. There’s no excuse not to.
