Advice for founders on my YC-company’s 3rd birthday.
It is Lilia’s 3rd birthday today, which means I have been working on giving every woman reproductive freedom for 1,095 days. 10% of my life. 40% of my time since graduating.
I have more conviction in our mission today than in any past moment. After 1,095 days things are starting to work — finally!
I don’t claim to have any of this figured out yet — I am only one founder with one vantage point, but here is what I have learned so far.
1. Love takes time, and so do companies
I used to want everything to happen yesterday, which meant I was always in a rush. In dating, I wanted to know ASAP whether he was *the one* — preferably by the 3rd date, thanks. In company building, I wanted to know yesterday whether we had built something people wanted. Or was I wasting my time?
Thing is, what could be needs time to unfold. And if you don’t let time do it’s thing, you never find out.
A couple wise friends said a couple wise things. Nikolai said “you’ll know he was the one when you’re 80 and looking back at a long life together.” Anna said “love takes time. And so do companies.”
I always thought it banal, but now I believe the old adage is true — good things really do take time.
2. Choose a problem you can’t help but care about
Not something you care about a lot. Not something you’re passionate about. Not a problem you think is important.
I literally mean something you cannot help but care about. A good test is that if you actively tried to convince yourself *not* to care about it, you couldn’t.
There have been at least 3 days I can think of where I was really serious about quitting. But I couldn’t, because I cared too much about the problem of equality and reproductive freedom. Women need this, they deserve it — hell, I wanted it, and so my company had to keep existing.
It was actually a little annoying, because I thought to myself, if only I could care less about this I could quit and do something easier.
One day I came really close to actually quitting. I’d thought about what I’d say to our investors, even called a friend who’d shut down a company and asked how to do it. I gave myself permission to quit, then asked myself — if I were free to do anything now, what would I want to do?
Damnit. Free from the burdens of running a company, I’d want only to keep working on this problem. So, I kept going.
3. Don’t run out of energy
Startup lore says the main reasons companies die are that they run out of money, don’t find product market fit, have cofounder implosion. My hunch is these are proximate causes of the real reason startups die, which is that founders run out of energy.
If a founder still has fight in her, she’s more likely to keep taking the swings needed to make it work. But once a founder is out of energy, game over.
Once I internalized this, I built my entire life around it. I paid more for good, healthy food. I started meditating for an hour every day. I moved to warm, sunny places. I exercised every day. I saw and spoke to friends often. I only spent time with people who were energy additive (or at least energy-neutral).
I leaned in to what my body and mind were asking for. If I’d gone to bed but had so many ideas I couldn’t sleep, I’d get up and work. Other times I felt spent by 5pm, so stopped. Sometimes I worked through the entire weekend. Other weekends I didn’t open my laptop. If it was sunny and I wanted to hike, I hiked. Funny enough, these “off” times — walking, meditating, hiking — are always where I get my best ideas.
Working and not working eventually became blurred — kind of like a professional athlete. When an athlete is in the cold plunge, they’re not on the court scoring points, but aren’t they still working on performance? It feels like that now.
Things are finally starting to work, 1,095 days in. Love takes time, and so do companies.
