Eye Contact: A Primal Force in Business
Look me in the eyes and tell me the truth.
Have you ever wondered why eye contact evokes such a powerful emotional response? From staring deeply into the eyes of a loved one, to a vexing glare on the bus, a direct gaze can be a potent non-verbal signal that immediately connects two individuals.
Eye contact can be found to permeate all aspects of our lives. Romantic poets write of our windows to the soul, providing glimpses into the deepest parts of ourselves, and revealing truths we’re unable to hide. We refer to love at first sight, a twinge in the heart when the eyes of two strangers lock.
We use eye contact to signal aggression, to convey annoyance, to maintain and assert our dominance over would-be rivals. We get caught in the eyes of a friend or mentor during intense and engaging conversation or lesson.
It seems eye contact is intrinsic to the very foundations of human communication, and vital to establishing our status within society. Indeed, there is a reason why ‘maintain eye contact’ is oft the first suggestion in many a self-help, business, and relationship book.
“The soul, fortunately, has an interpreter — often an unconscious but still a faithful interpreter — in the eye.”
— Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre
Today, we’re going to explore the evolutionary and neurological reasons determining our responses to eye contact, and how they can be applied within today’s business world.
Our Leering Origins
There is something inherently primal about eye contact; a vestige of our evolutionary upbringing, to a time before language where a look could mean the difference between friend or foe, a mate or an aggressor.
The influence eye contact has on our species’ social behaviour and individual psychology has been linked back to our primate ancestors. We can see in our great ape cousins, that eye contact is used within communities for several functions in various social contexts. Studies have shown that in gorillas, eye contact is used to initiate play, sexual interactions, conflict, and as a way of greeting one another.
However, the sociological significance of eye contact grew as humans became an increasingly social and cooperative species. The complexities of eye contact naturally evolved parallel to the complexities of human social life.
The cooperative eye hypothesis proposed by Kobayashi and Koshima in 2002, explored the reasons behind the specific appearance of the human eye. It suggests that the eye has distinctive features which have evolved to make it easier for humans to identify and follow another’s gaze whilst communicating.
This theory explains the significance eye contact has had in our evolution and survival, allowing the easy facilitation of communication as we began to form larger tribes and complex communities, veering away from a ‘survival of the fittest’ mentality and towards collective altruism.
A Touch of Neuroscience
While evolution developed our eye-centric communicative behaviour, it is within the brain we can find the source of our subconscious and involuntary reactions to eye contact.
In science, eye contact has been studied extensively. Neuroscientists have carefully mapped our enigmatic brain, pinpointing those precise regions which light up during a captivating staring contest.
The cerebellum, an ancient and primitive part of our brain, found in all animal species (with a brain), is responsible for our ability to meet and maintain eye contact. The cerebellum regulates our motor-functions, vital to allowing our ancestors to accurately focus their gaze on tracking and hunting prey. However, the cerebellum has evolved beyond this primarily survivalist function, to our ability to identify and lock onto human eyes, regardless of an ocean of stimuli that might otherwise distract us.
Whilst the cerebellum handles the physical fixation between eyes, it is the right frontal lobe, a part of the brain correlated with empathy and social communication, which induces the emotional sensation. If eye contact is prolonged, the brain will soon begin to pump the body with oxytocin, AKA the love hormone.
Several studies have found that simply by staring into someone’s eyes increased feelings of love and affection will begin to develop. This phenomenon is present regardless of the relationship between these two individuals. Further studies have shown that even two strangers will feel closer and more connected to one another following a deep gaze. An undeniable testament to the simple power of eye contact.
The psychological effects of eye contact are so embedded within our psyche, that we cannot hope to override the involuntary emotional response that takes over. It’s a strange phenomenon which we all share. An uncontrollable evocation when our eyes meet those of another.
Try to hold your gaze with the next person you see and you’ll quickly realise just how difficult it can be to maintain your composure.
With all this said, it now seems apparent that for one to succeed in business, and indeed in any and all aspects of our interpersonal lives, a mastery of eye contact is required.
Down to Business
Depending on whether your goal is to elicit trust, form stronger business relations, to intimidate, or to dominate the negotiations, eye contact is one of your most useful tools.
As we’ve discussed, eye contact is a potent remnant of our pre-civilised lives. Today’s business world is not a far-cry from tribalism, with companies often going to war with each other over market dominance, hostile take-overs, or aggressive trade deals. Boardrooms are the new battlegrounds.
But just as our ancestors would fight between tribes, they would also negotiate peace and mutually beneficial trade. Eye contact, as a multi-faceted communicative tool, would have been used in hostilities and alliances, for war and for peace.
For these reasons, we can find eye contact as imperative to succeeding within today’s tribalistic business world.
Forming your Alliances
The successful use of eye contact, whether it’s conscious or not, will enhance and enrich your professional relationships. If you’ve ever wondered why the most charming and likeable guy in the office is perceived that way, consistent eye contact has a lot to do with it.
In terms of trustworthiness, genuineness, confidence, and agreeableness, all of these are shown to be more perceived in individuals who maintain eye contact.
When seeking to form alliances and friendships within the office, studies have shown that eye contact can encourage a more consolidated agreement on subjects you mutually agree upon, cementing shared positions.
Several studies have also confirmed that eye contact has the dual ability to increase other’s retention of what you are saying, and causes people to notice and remember you more. Certainly valuable in any professional setting.
True eye contact has become increasingly sparse, in a world dominated by phone calls, emails, texts, and social media. However, its decline in prominence also serves to enhance the power of its use.
For those who choose to master it, eye contact is undeniably effective in building deeper and more substantial relationships with colleagues, clients, and superiors alike.
Conquering (or Converting) Your Rivals
It’s undeniable that if you hope to succeed in business you will be faced by rivals, competitors, and difficult co-workers. So, where eye contact can help you to build relationships, it can also help in overcoming professional adversity.
Often, confidence and dominant affirmation are key to maintaining your ground during a negotiation, to prevent you from being pushed around, and to command respect from both those above and below you. Through direct and consistent eye contact, this can be achieved. Indeed, to avert one's gaze is a noticeable act of submission, one which is witnessed in several species when bowing to their dominant superior.
It’s been shown, that those of a higher social status make more eye contact when they are speaking, and less when they are listening. This is an involuntary display of power and one which can be imitated to the same effect.
However, if you are not looking to simply intimidate, and hope to dissipate hostility, it’s often advised to maintain an equal amount of eye contact whether you are speaking or listening. This helps to make the other person feel heard, validated, and important, and can begin to break down the walls of unfamiliarity and distrust.
Interestingly, studies have shown that eye contact can actually dissuade someone even further when attempting to convince them of something they already disagree with. To use this to your advantage, if someone is attempting to convince you of something, or sell you something, to which you aren’t at all interested in, maintaining eye contact will make you more resistant to persuasion.
As a final note, it is important that eye contact is maintained for the correct amount of time. You don’t want to appear as creepy or too intense. The general rule seems to be to follow a natural rhythm, looking away for a pause at the end of a sentence, before looking back again.
Our primal, evolutionary tendencies are inescapable, and unarguably still just as prevalent in our cushy, modern lives, as our tree-swinging ancestor’s. While the context might have changed, eye contact has retained its position as a cornerstone of how we communicate as a species.
I hope this article has suitably convinced you of the important role eye contact plays in our lives, and of the ways in which you can capitalise on it. Choose to master the art of eye-contact and watch as it transforms the relationships of both your professional and personal lives.
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