In Negotiations, These Drivers Can Heavily Influence Outcomes
“Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate.”- John F. Kennedy
Do we realize how often we are in the process of negotiation in our lives? Take a typical day, week, or a year, and you will find yourself negotiating time and again- at work, at home, in social interactions and more, often without even realizing it.
We have seen many discussions on negotiation techniques and strategies. JFK’s quote above captures a perspective that is close to my heart from personal experience. I will, therefore, dwell on this through a few examples that highlight two pertinent dimensions; One, the pervasive nature of negotiation, even when not explicitly structured as such, and two, some important motivations that drive the approach and outcomes of negotiation.
Have a look at the picture below, which recently appeared as an advertisement in the daily newspaper.
What does it tell us? At first glance, it is a communication that seeks to inform customers that they can safely continue to order their favorite pizza in a virus-prone environment- an indirect sales cum public comfort message.
Looked more closely, it is a form of negotiation. Most, if not all customers in a coronavirus surrounded environment will be inclined to avoid ordering cooked food and allowing delivery agents around their homes- a disaster for a company whose business relies substantially on pizzas through delivery.
It, therefore, has two choices- accept the inevitable for the foreseeable future and let business suffer; or, get innovative, not just with its approach to food delivery, but equally with the messaging that negotiates with the customer to retain the delivered pizza as a channel of choice.
Importantly, as well, the message can take two alternative tones. Either it can be defensive, communicating a possibility, and then hoping for the best. That would be negotiating out of fear in the context of JFK’s quote. Or, even while accepting the reality, it takes the tone of negotiating with its best foot forward, i.e., not fearing to negotiate by emphasizing belief in its product and renewed strategy, and getting the message across confidently.
Negotiating out of fear is likely to yield sub-optimal results, while not fearing to negotiate where appropriate will often provide positive outcomes.
Having articulated the principle, let me extend it to a few situations in work and life with some examples.
As a consultant, I often found myself in the situation of negotiating fees with clients. There were times when I was pushing myself to negotiate because I had business targets to meet, and I was anxious about missing them. At other times, I was confident that the value my team had provided justified a better fee.
When the situation fell in the former category, I was negotiating out of fear and often failed. In the latter, I was confident about my proposition since I could back myself to convince the client, and he could not easily replace my services because of the value he was receiving. Importantly as well, the first was a situation where I should ideally not be negotiating, while the second situation justified it for its merit.
Another example- As a leader of teams, I have been in situations where team members with high expectations during annual appraisal cycles would apply pressure by threatening to quit. Although the need of the hour was to explain to them the basis of their ratings objectively, I also knew the adverse impact of losing a team member.
Discussing with them with this fear in the background meant negotiating on a weak footing, even leaving the individual unconvinced, whereas objectively showing them the areas of improvement often led to diffusing the situation and a positive way forward.
Likewise, when negotiating for a promotion, raise, or even a change of role, I have observed that initiating the discussion out of fear often places you in a weak spot and an exploitable position that plays to your detriment. Examples of fear include the desire to escape negative drivers such as frustration with the current role, the limited opportunities it seems to provide and dissatisfaction with relationships.
Instead, if we base the discussion on our confidence in the value we will bring to the proposed role, or on proven achievements, it is more likely to yield favorable results.
Fear in negotiations can take diverse forms. In business, they can range from losing profits, market standing, or reputation. In family and society, one may fear the loss of relationships and social status.
Conclusion
Negotiations will not always involve sitting across a table with a pre-agreed schedule. There will be numerous situations that are not intended to be negotiations but become so since a large proportion of our interactions and communication inevitably seek a meeting of objectives.
The point to bear in mind is that negotiations driven by fear of loss, criticism, or aversions such as anger and greed are fraught with the risk of adverse outcomes.
On the other hand, it is possible to negotiate courageously towards achieving favorable outcomes or at least developing the next steps, through complete awareness of the context and an unbiased conviction about our position. Courageous negotiation also requires that we are unafraid to lose our argument, either in the face of a healthier perspective or simply when things do not turn out in our favor.
In any event, let us not negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate!
