Living Through Tension

Removing Friction & Our Attachment Vulnerability

Taylor J Wallace
4 min readMay 6, 2018

As we remove friction, we flow and find our path, our journey of who we will become. The tension lies in who we are, in being us, in the present moment, in and of a place that exists between who we were as a result of the responses / decisions we’ve made and who we will become through those we will make.

We are perpetually playing out this game of “hide and seek” — Watts, of who we really are. And it’s the playing of the game that is the delight oflife.

The delight and suffering, the curiosity and intrigue, the regret and appreciation, the optimism and belief; all of it that is and creates the state of joy, of living, of tension.

With that comes an uncomfortable and unknown nature but avoidance is folly. We struggle with the potential of who we might become if we surrender into the curiosities of the unknown. We struggle to reach while maintaining the sense of comfort, achievement and attachment and sense of entitlement to our present as one earned result of our past.

It is these two forces that keep us here, where we are, as we are. We can stay, go, be or not be. That may be the question there but there is no right answer, only movement, only moment, only balance in and of tension.

Rather it’s our response or better how we respond in and to tension that determines our level of self-awareness and ultimately our level of “be-ing” and emotional state or “well be-ing”. Each moment, each event is a decisive statement manifesting the nature of not only who we are but of who we might be with infinite potential.

It’s very simple. Just as we have the decision to wake up, to open our eyes to engage with ourselves and others and to decide and shape the body and mind with our energy, attention and consumption… We have the freedom to shape the person we become and how we will come to view our world. It’s truly ours to create.

When we harness this balance of tension and step into who we are, we might not only find the person we seek to be but have the wisdom and foresight to navigate through the very journey that is our living embodiment of life.

May you find that which is seeking you.

Attachment Is A Vulnerability

Self-to-Self, Of Self And Other…

What would you do if you couldn’t tell or show anyone? If you couldn’t monetize it, show any attachment or proof of performance / achievement? How would you spend your time, doing what, and with whom? If you’re feeling lost, probably just do of this stuff.

If you got a second chance, to do everything your way, to live out your days and decisions and every aspect in a purely authentic way.. what would you do differently?

Now let’s consider that this might very well be that second chance, and that you have your entire life ahead of you to shape yourself, your thinking and the person you seek to be and that nobody is stopping you other than yourself. Be here, now.

For that which is outside of our control, outside of our sphere of influence, beyond arms reach or of a measure of thought… Maybe it’s not important to know much about it, to worry our spend our time or energy even considering it.

Some examples: https://markmanson.net/6-things-people-should-stop-giving-s…

Forget intelligence, performance, achievement and everything that everyone else is measuring us on.. they’ve got that covered, they’ve got their best people working on it. How often do we measure our emotional intelligence / awareness? What was tough today?

How did we react and respond? What does this say and contribute to the person we might become? What did we learn? How will that change you? We can be different or we can be more of the same, the latter certainly seems more interesting.

Attachment is a vulnerability. Our thoughts, ideas and ideals of the past, present, future including our emotions, ambitions, validations, outcomes (achievements, and failures), etc. shape our image of who we were, the character of who we are and boundaries of who we might become.

Vulnerability is powerful human quality, the impact of which we underestimate. It can hold us back as much as it can bring us forward. Both attachment and vulnerability are cozy, comfortable, easy… It’s holding us back.

There’s no growth in comfort, only more of the same.

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Taylor J Wallace

Thoughts and words. My curious experiment in designing a life worth living and passionately killing it, one beautiful moment at a time.