Setting Deadlines Is Great. Hitting Deadlines Is The Best.

A mindset shift when uncertainty keeps you from getting it done

Deb Knobelman, PhD
Sep 5, 2018 · 4 min read

I scheduled two writing projects to work on today.

The first, my newsletter. I knew that I had a deadline to finish it today. I made a committment to myself to send it out every Thursday morning, no matter what. And I’ve done it for several weeks now. I am beginning to learn the rhythm. (Shameless plug: go to debknobelman.com to sign up for it. I think its pretty good).

The second, work on the first half of building a quiz that I will offer on my website. With the ultimate deadline of finishing the first draft by Friday.

Not a BuzzFeed quiz. Not something that involves your Zodiac sign. (Although I do love astrology. I’m a Pisces. Feel free to tell me what that means.)

I am very interested in learning more about what is keeping you from getting more done. From being as productive as you want to be.

I know my hangup. I’m a perfectionist. Everything I produce needs to be A+ or I am ashamed to show it to anyone. So I will work on something forever without considering it finished.

But I am only one person. So I want to put together a quiz, so that I can help you all. With whatever is holding you back. In the ways that I have learned to help myself.

But I’ve never put together a quiz before. I had a 15 minute freebie conversation with the sales rep at one of the quiz vendors. She walked me through the basics. She told me it should take about 4 hours to put something together for the first time. Then she gave me a worksheet outlining the steps to put it together. And told me she could review the quiz when I’m done. Which is very helpful.

But, I still have no idea what I am doing.

So, for my newsletter, I knocked it out first thing. I allocated 2 hours for it today — I spend a lot of time finding interesting links and books and whatnot. In addition to links to my most recent blog posts. But, I actually finished quicker than that. I already had some good ideas in my head.

It was time to start building the quiz. I had two hours to finish the first half of the tasks on the worksheet.

And then, I fell down an Instagram Stories rabbit hole.

I looked up, and my timer was going off. (I set timers for predetermined tasks. It helps me keep track of my day). I used up all the time that I had allocated for the first task of building the quiz.

I missed my deadline.

And now my day needs to get rearranged.

I either need to put this quiz off for another day. Or, give up on yoga.

Why did I do it? Why would I self-sabotage my day?

Because the uncertainty scared me. I am scared that I will spend 4 hours or more and produce something shameful. Something that isn’t perfect.

And this is how we don’t meet our own goals.

This is how we think we ‘don’t have enough time.’ An expert gave me what sounded like a very reasonable timeframe. I broke it down into tasks. And set a timer.

And still I “ran out of time.”

Even a year ago, I would have beat myself up about this. What’s wrong with me? I’m awful. And then I’d feel enormous anxiety.

I’d get the task done. But I would white-knuckle through it. Driving myself with fear and shame.

But not today. I’ve learned how to shift my mindset.

Huh, I told myself. I guess this quiz feels a little more uncertain than I thought. I am uncomfortable.

But why is it a problem to feel uncomfortable? That doesn’t mean anything is wrong. It means I am trying something new.

And then I went to yoga. Because I am not looking to punish myself. Not anymore.

So, I will find time tonight to work on the quiz. During my son’s baseball practice.

I will for sure finish at least half of it tomorrow. Because my ultimate deadline is to send my first draft of the quiz back to the sales rep by Friday.

I know I can do it. The unexpected always comes up. But if we can find a way to move forward. That is the key to hitting deadlines.

I trust myself to get it done.

Because instead of pushing myself with fear. I am supporting myself with curiosity and understanding. I understand that I am uncomfortable and uncertain. That’s OK. That’s allowed. That happens.

But it doesn’t mean I’m not going to keep moving forward.

I’m not going to waste even more time wallowing in shame.

Friday, I am going to hit my deadline.

Because, as the psychologist Erich Fromm said:

The quest for certainty blocks the search for meaning. Uncertainty is the very condition to compel man to unfold his powers.

With the right framework plus the right mindset, anything is possible.

I offer realistic, specific insights on productivity and anxiety management, as well as new reading recommendations every week in my personal newsletter. www.debknobelman.com.

This story is published in The Startup, Medium’s largest entrepreneurship publication followed by +365,945 people.

Subscribe to receive our top stories here.

The Startup

Medium's largest active publication, followed by +527K people. Follow to join our community.

Deb Knobelman, PhD

Written by

Neuroscience. Wall Street. C-Suite. Parent. Recovering Nervous Nelly. https://www.debknobelman.com

The Startup

Medium's largest active publication, followed by +527K people. Follow to join our community.

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade