The Damaging Tears of White Women

Two weeks ago I walked into a Seminary conversation on human sexuality.

As a short and succinct background, a Midwestern centered christian denomination recently annexed one of their, now former, churches and pastors because of their affirming stance on the wider breadth of human sexuality. The conversation two weeks ago was on the effects of this denominations decision.

The Dean of the Seminary gave an introduction and I noticed some of the twenty-three or so people in the room grow antsy for the opportunity to chime in on their thoughts and concerns although the invisible talking stick had not yet been passed although 10–15–20 minutes had already gone past.

New to the space and group myself, I sat quiet when an already, and perhaps rightfully, irked white woman reminded the room (read: the Dean) that the conversation was marketed as a ‘forum’ although it seemed to be taking shape as an informational session. For the audience, no deciphering was needed as nodding heads indicated agreement.

When the talking stick was passed off I can’t say I remember much about the first comments but what I do remember most is the part about the white women crying.

Crying because they knew those that were and could be hurt by such a decision. Crying because their friends wondered why they would still attend a school with benefactors who would make such a decision, crying because they don’t know how to answer their friends when they hypothetically ask why they would…