The Other Way to Journal
No Pen, No Paper, No Pressure
I hate journaling. At least I assume I do; I’ve done so little of it that I can’t really be sure. I have tried at times, but not just random times, mostly just when things are going badly. So if I go back and look at what I’ve written, I get a distorted picture of what has mostly been a really happy life.
But I know it’s helpful. Google gives over 1.5 billion results for “benefits of journaling.” My library includes books and articles about the power of writing down thoughts, goals and intentions. I teach writing, and I am writing a self-help book, so I understand how writing lets us record and work through our thoughts and feelings.
I guess journaling reminds me of meditation or flossing: something I know I’m supposed to do but rarely follow through on, and when I do, I don’t like it.
That recognition led me to commit to more frequent journaling with a focus on the positive. Wondering if I was put off by the “dear diary” method I had tried before, I thought shorter entries with set instructions would help me. I set a goal of reflecting on and writing three brief items at the end of each day:
1) Something I did that day that I am proud of (that is, something I did that makes me happy or moves me closer to my goals)
2) Something from that day that I am grateful for (something outside of myself that I appreciate)
3) Something I plan to accomplish or something I am looking forward to the next day (a goal or intention)
I put a nice journal on my nightstand and recorded these thoughts every day when I got into bed. My notebook even accompanied me on a trip out of town, and vacation fun gave me extra things to be thankful for. After the trip, I hoped the practice would help create a positive outlook about my normal routine and/or new things to be happy about.
After a few weeks, though, even the simple journaling began to feel like a burden. I felt like I was struggling to come up with new things to write. To some degree, I was grading myself (I guess my day job got in the way) and I wasn’t earning A’s. To find inspiration and positivity, I would glance back over previous entries, which helped a little, but the practice felt like a responsibility rather than a remedy.
Another problem was that I found it mentally stimulating rather than relaxing. Reflecting and thinking so much was interfering with just drifting off to sleep. My solution was to switch the contemplation to first thing in the morning, when I wanted to create positive, stimulating thoughts. That helped a little, but I still finished the practice feeling more resentful than rejuvenated.
So I lightened my homework assignment: instead of requiring writing, I just had to think of things in the three categories. While I was afraid that this lower commitment would lead to my stopping altogether, it turned out to be easier and more sustainable.
I’m calling it the PGP Reflection (proud, grateful, plan). It creates a simple and doable positive frame for my days. And I am happy to report that it has been working. First thing, before I look at my phone or start to stress about the day, I take some time to think about what made me happy yesterday and what will be good about today. My mornings now start with me in a better mindset. A couple of times, I have forgotten to do my reflection first thing, and I remember with a sort of gasp, but I find that I want to do it instead of feeling like I should.
The three categories have also crept into my daily activities. Now, when I accomplish something or when I feel happy, I mentally plant a seed to remember to include those things in tomorrow’s reflection.
There are a few takeaways here that could help other guilty non-journalers:
• One is that the reflection can be more valuable than the recording. After all, the origin of the word “journal” refers to a daily practice; the written record part came later.
• Also, the lack of written record makes me less concerned about repeating items on my PGP list. It’s ok to feel proud or grateful today for the same things I was yesterday or last week. Those are the things that make me happy.
• Finally, I learned that I don’t like to write if I don’t have an audience. Even though I teach writing (or maybe because I do), I don’t enjoy writing for just myself. When I was writing this article, I was imagining you reading it and that kept me going. (Thank you for being my audience!)
Finishing this article has given me a head start on tomorrow’s PGP Exercise. Before I get up, I will remember to be proud that I published this piece and grateful that you read it, and I will plan to start working on another one.
Please let me know in the comments if you try out the PGP Reflection or if you have your own techniques for creating and sustaining positivity.
Thank you, Liz, for letting me use your painting.
