What Does a Yellow Light Mean?
Slow Down
In the late 1970’s television sitcom Taxi, Jim ventures over to the DMV with his buddies to take his driver’s license written exam. What ensues is one of the most memorable and humorous exchanges in sitcom history.
It’s a skit that comes back to me over and over again as, before the current crisis, we were constantly encouraged to SPEED UP in our ever-changing world. Often, we were racing from meeting to meeting, taking the next 5-minute phone call, banging out the next email, or responding to a flurry of text messages. Some of you may still be doing that!
Now is an excellent time to ask: “what kind of relationships am I creating with all of this busyness?” What is the quality of my work?
If you are honest with yourself, I believe your answer will be: “I’m active with lots of folks and getting s**t done, but there is very little depth.” You may be engaging in, as Stephen Covey once said, “the thick of thin things.”
One blessing from the Covid-19 pandemic is that some people are slowing down. Those that do are getting in touch with the present moment (as well as with each other). They’re going deep with friends, family, colleagues, clients, and customers. They’re choosing fulfilling work. The crisis is providing a great reminder that relationships are built through long, slow conversations over time. Emails and text messages don’t cut it. Relationships blossom when we focus on the other person, and that person comes to know that we are there for them. “Being with” someone is a lost art, and yet, some are rediscovering it now, albeit using video and telephone.
I’m fond of another Stephen Covey expression, “With people, slow is fast, and fast is slow.” When we slow down, people and the world come into focus. It is from that place that we can see (and seize) opportunities while being of service to others. Especially during this crisis.
Slowing down, whether a conscious choice or one foisted upon you right now, can lead to a greater appreciation for life even in the face of the significant challenges we currently face.
Here are some suggestions on making the most of this “slower” time.
- Be Present. Our minds tend to wander, especially when we slow down. When you find yourself thinking about something you need to do, or something that’s already happened, or something that might occur… gently bring yourself back to the present moment. Focus on what’s going on right now. On your actions, on your environment, on others around you.
- Disconnect from Media. Stop watching cable news! The assault by the information coming in is unhealthy. There’s nothing you can do about most of it, and by watching the news, you are putting yourself in a state of stress and anxiety.
- Focus on People. Too often, when we spend time with friends, family, and colleagues, we’re not there with them. You may listen half-heartedly, words may come out of your mouth, but you frequently distracted by your devices. You are there, but your mind is on other things. You’ve checked out. None of us are immune to this. However, when you make a conscious effort to focus and be fully present with the people you’re with, they will appreciate it, and you will be much more effective in your communication.
- Spend Time in Nature. Right now, many of us are shut in our home. However, even if you are under a shelter-in-place order, you can still go out for groceries. Relish that opportunity! Don’t be talking on your cell phone when you go for your walk. Instead, take the time to observe your environment. Notice things you may have never seen. Smile at other people, and take a deep breath of fresh air. Enjoy any plants that may be budding. If allowable, exercise outdoors. Feel the sensation of the wind on your face and the earth under your feet.
- Savor Your Food. Instead of cramming food into your maw — learn to eat slowly. Be mindful of each bite, and appreciate the flavors and textures. Take this time to eat more fresh food, and as Emeril Lagasse was fond of saying: “kick it up a notch” with some great spices.
- Find Joy in Anything. Whatever you’re doing, be fully present, and appreciate every aspect of it. For example, when you wash the dishes after that savory meal, really feel the temperature of the water, the slipperiness of suds, the smoothness of the glaze on the china, and roughness of that cast iron skillet.
- Breathe. When you find yourself anxious and stressed out, pause, and take a deep breath. Feel the air coming into your body, expanding your chest and belly on the inhale. Release the stress on the exhale. By entirely focusing on each breath, you bring yourself back to the present moment.
I will share that I find this incredibly challenging. My mind is often very speedy. And, technology (internet, email, text messaging) accelerates the speed. This week I intend to do my best to slow down. I will exercise and savor each meal. I will chew and taste my food before swallowing. I will be present for my wife and children. I will meet with my colleagues by video and share what I appreciate about them. I’ll be curious and remember to breathe.
I encourage you to do that same.
And, when you are tempted to bounce off the walls like ricochet rabbit, remember to ask:
Whaaaatttt…..Doessss…..AAAAAAA…..Yelllllowww…..Lighhhtttt…..Meeeannn???
