What Happens When People Actually, Really, Listen to Us?
Someone is talking to you and they suddenly hesitate, unsure whether to go on. Or perhaps they begin to feel upset or belligerent, ready to assume you are rejecting their point of view. Or they are broadcasting to you, indifferent toward your presence or response, interested only in the sound of their own voice and perspective.
In all cases, what happens when you say “I’m listening” to them?
If you haven’t done this, try it the next time one of those situations occurs. For without exception, the vibration of the conversation changes.
We humans are not known for our patience toward anything different from ourselves and our ways. We are quick to label each other, quick to make assumptions, quick to judge. This is not only a form of protection, it’s also a constant state of being inattentive to our own being and state of mind. We expend most of our energy defining others, not engaging with others. And we expend far less of our energy engaging, really engaging, with our own inner feelings and awareness.
We aren’t listening to ourselves, much less the people we encounter. So what are we doing, then?
Turn it around and imagine you are the speaker. You are unsure whether the person you are talking to is interested. Or perhaps you think that person is…
