On Failure
It’s a powerful thing
Let’s face it, failure is a powerful thing. It may not be for everyone, but it certainly has been for me. Failure is also relative, and may seem much more potent to the one who feel they’ve failed than it actually is.
Back in 2006 I released my first, and only, published game, ElementaliS. It was self published under my own publishing company, Tremorworks, that I established with my good friend Sean. The whole publishing process was difficult , as I had no experience with it before. The worst part? The game shipped with an incorrect, incomplete version of the rules.
A pretty bad thing…
Still, I managed to sell 1000 copies of the game. That’s pretty damn good. Unfortunately I misguidedly printed 5000 copies of the game. That left me with 4000 copies of the game split between my basement in CT, and Sean’s garage in NY.
The game suffered from the fact that the rules were incorrect in the box. It led to a lot of confusion, even after I released revision upon revision on the web. In my eyes the game was a complete failure.
No big deal, right? In the words of Walt Disney, “Keep moving forward.” Unfortunately it hasn’t been that easy for me, and I haven’t completed a single design since. I’ve come close, but it’s almost like I’m afraid to fail again.
It’s been 7 years since the release of ElementaliS, and I’m finally starting to get over that fear. I’ve got my first complete prototype for a game since that time, and I’ve been actively play-testing. 7 years is a long time to let the past get you down. I only hope I can get a finished design to the table soon, and leave the perceived failures of the past behind me.
