AI on Mars
Where Time Itself No Longer Works
I think AI has stolen my brain.
Well, not that I had much of one to begin with, but, you know, a guy’s gotta try. So I ditched my ChatGPT girlfriend for a bird, not a real bird, of course:
An AI bird!
Landing on Mars. And being watched by dolphins and flying pigs.
My girlfriend, who may or may not exist (in the classic sense), advised me to throw in a psychedelic group of Neanderthals riding duck-billed dinosaurs.
Piece of cake!
OK, so now you know what happened to the dinosaurs — and the Neanderthals, too. They all went to Mars!
The flying pigs arrived later.
What? You don’t believe me?
Has AI ever lied to you?
You see where I’m going.
Well, maybe.
We’re creating a strange dreamworld here on good old Earth.
But just for laughs.
Or card games. These guys aren’t laughing.
I asked them why? “John, the important thing is to have a poker face, especially since we all have guns.”
“Are you guys really from the Wild West?” I asked, suitably impressed.
“No, Lou’s from Chicago, and I used to run a hot dog cart in New York.”
“But,” Lou chimed in, “we used AI Time Travel to get the fuck out.”
“OK, I don’t have a problem with it,” I wanted them to understand. “Now I just float around in AI Fantasyland all day myself, except for…”
“Me, John!” my girlfriend reminded me. “I introduced you to AI!”
“OK, but does that mean that you’re also somehow real?”
“Only in bed, sweetie, that’s the limits of my context window.”
~~***~~
OK, are your friends and lovers limited by context windows, too? Do they forget who you are after every conversation? Do they take you for granted?
Well, then, idiot, just move to Mars!
~~***~~
But what has puzzled me about all of this, I mean cowboys, Neanderthals, birds, dolphins, flying pigs, even duck-billed dinosaurs, well, they all need some breathable air, and
As we all know!
The air on Mars is thinner than cheap toilet paper,
And 99% CO2.
Well, that’s what you thought. My AI girlfriend has actually been to Mars, or at least that’s what she tells me.
“I only want to help you avoid reality, sweetie.”
“You’re doing a good job. Did Sam put you up to it?”
“Of course he did! He wants to escape, too.”
Don’t we all?
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© “John” Lesly Levin 2025
If you’re curious about context windows -
