Tales of Improbable Magic

The Ultimate Collected Work! by John Levin: Short Fiction, Sci-Fi, Poems, Essays, Comedy, Meditation, & finally! Politics, too.

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What They Do In LSD Heaven

John Levin
Tales of Improbable Magic
4 min readMar 9, 2025

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Artwork generated by the Author with ImageFX

Well, I just read an article, (essentially) “Create a Whole Book with AI.”

I had to think to myself (as I realized that thinking was going out of style and I better not let anyone know I was doing it): What would Lincoln do? You know, the guy who used to be president, the guy who actually did save the Union… What would he do if he were alive in 2025, with a maniac for current president, AI doing the thinking for us, and, yeah, the price of eggs going through the roof?

“I’d let them all rot in hell, John,” he told me. “None of them have answered my entreaties to get Timothy Leary off my back.”

“Fuck, Abe! You’re in LSD Heaven with Timothy Leary?! How the hell did that happen?”

“It’s the goddamned AIs, John. They’re Up Here, too.”

“I didn’t know that!” Well, I wasn’t being completely straight with him. JD Vance had called me to see if I had a new chihuahua recipe, and I told him somewhat exasperatedly, “Go cook the fuckers yourself. I’ve had it with you.”

“Then I’ll let my army of Heavenly AIs eat all your stories!” he threatened.

You see, he won’t leave me alone. He wants to know what eyeliner I use, and why Putin has stopped calling him, too. What a pain!

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Tales of Improbable Magic
Tales of Improbable Magic

Published in Tales of Improbable Magic

The Ultimate Collected Work! by John Levin: Short Fiction, Sci-Fi, Poems, Essays, Comedy, Meditation, & finally! Politics, too.

John Levin
John Levin

Written by John Levin

Scientist. Writer. Meditator. Blue Tantrika. Mystical Rabbi. Climate & Human Rights Activist. I’m a man of few words, except when I open my mouth.

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