Erasmus as a test of friendship

Merlin Paggi is an Estonian student, who studied Logistics and supply chain management programme at TalTech. Merlin went on Erasmus during her Master’s. It was a brave and adventurous decision and unfortunately not everyone has supported her. Here is a very sincere and mature story about Erasmus year in Milan. Plus 7 wonderful takeaways the exchange experience will provide you with.

New Year’s resolution

Ciao! My name is Merlin Paggi. I’m Estonian and I studied Logistics and supply chain management programme at TalTech, both in Bachelor’s and Master’s degree. The idea to go for Erasmus came to me in January 2019, when we sat down with the whole family and thought about what to do this year. Something like New Year’s resolutions. At that point, I suggested that I could do Erasmus. I couldn’t do it during my undergraduate years, and it’s not very common in the Master’s. Still, at that point, nothing or anyone was holding me back. It was the last chance to see the world and learn a new culture without any obligations. So it was decided — my second Master’s year I will spend abroad.

Milan, Lisbon or Madrid?

To see what my options were, I opened up the TalTech Mobility Centre page. The universities that only offered other faculties were not suitable for obvious reasons; I could only choose from my faculty and among public universities. Since Germany, which was offered for my field, is not a country close to my heart, I carefully reviewed all the higher education public institutions. In the end, my choices were Polytechnic Universities of Milan, Lisbon and Madrid. I got the opportunity to study at Politecnico di Milano University, which thankfully was my first choice because all the information there was in English. There was support from the university for international students, and their offered subjects were perfect for me. Plus, who could say no to a fashion and industrial city?

Support and jealousy

My family was very supportive of this decision. They were even more excited than I, who, quite often, got tired of filling out all sorts of bureaucratic documents. The whole family helped me find a suitable place to live. What sightseeing to do in Milan, which cities to visit in Italy, and perhaps other European countries to see during my Erasmus. When I hesitated about the rationality of this idea, my family was emotionally very supportive and affirmed that the people who do crazy things are the ones who will eventually change the world. It was a different story with friends — there was only one person who supported me. Because of Erasmus, I lost 90% of my “friends”. I realised that people were jealous. Some stopped communicating after hearing the news. Some said negative things. Some criticised my rationality when I asked for help. The zoo of the Lord is large and wide, and I realised that it’s hard for people to be happy for others when they’re aren’t satisfied with themselves. I lost friends, but now there was room for better people to come.

Emphasis on traveling

The Erasmus+ programme is primarily designed to explore another country and culture by studying one’s speciality in a host university. However, there is also a great emphasis on travel to broaden your horizons further. Students coming to Politecnico di Milano were able to go on various outings with ESN. For example, I made a trip to Oktoberfest in Munich. However, I have to say that it’s much easier to travel alone or with a smaller group. I visited Turin and Como with some friends; made solo trips to Venice and Dublin before the borders and cities were closed. I was pleased with all the trips and still remember them.

Your adventure awaits

Looking at the world, I can say that I am glad that I decided to do Erasmus and recommend it to everyone. It’s definitely scary, but doing just one semester will teach you and change you as a person so much. Like Bilbo, when he went on his adventures and when he returned to the Shire. Never the same again. Yes, Erasmus will be scary. Yes, you will have moments where you think — what am I doing here or I don’t belong here, or I will fail. It’s normal. Have your pity cry party, but then wipe the tears away. Your adventure awaits you and your life wants to be lived. The experience of Erasmus is something you wouldn’t get when you are at home.

7 things Erasmus taught me

1. Patience and perseverance. If you need documents, be polite when you try to get them, but be stubborn, because otherwise you just won’t get them.

2. Confidence. It’s a powerful feeling that no one can crush when you’ve lived in a different country and culture and not died of starvation or by a devastating virus, screwed up your health, set your apartment on fire and also finished with excellent grades. After that, no one can shake your confidence.

3. Don’t care about peoples opinion. I honestly don’t care what people think or say about me. There will always be those who just don’t like you and Italy has taught me to be above that.

4. Live in the moment. Oh, so cliché, but so right at the moment. Because of the coronavirus, I had to cancel at least three trips, which was extremely unfortunate. Still, when I clicked “Cancellation”, I thought — at least I could do this or that. Don’t postpone activities or trips to a nonexistent future because you don’t really know if you will have it. Make them now or soon, because if you’re stuck in an apartment, it’s nice to remember those memories.

5. Keep the door open for people who want to leave your life. Not all people are meant to be by your side forever, and that’s OK. Also, drop the idea that during Erasmus, you will find friends forever. If you don’t meet or talk to these people daily, those relationships will be forgotten, and that’s OK.

6. Just be yourself. You don’t have to change who you are just because you’re in another country.

7. Courage to live in another country. Once you have done Erasmus, it won’t be such a big deal to live in another city again. For example, if your workplace asks if you are up for it. Of course, you are — you have already done it so how hard can it be?

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